


Split Open The Heart

by Ashesandmint



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: ...and mild blood kink, ...mostly canon-compliant lmao, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Angst, Blood Drinking, Bloodplay, F/F, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Black Eagles Route, Marking, Obsession, Painplay, Romance, Smut, complicated feelings, vampire!edelgard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:08:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 26,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24161848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashesandmint/pseuds/Ashesandmint
Summary: The experiments performed on Edelgard turned her into something inhuman. The weight of the future still lies on her. The war is near, all anyone could do is fulfill their role, like chess-piece.
Relationships: Dorothea Arnault/Edelgard von Hresvelg
Comments: 26
Kudos: 139





	1. Irritations of the skin

Dorothea felt the chill run up her spine uninvited, and yet the weather was fine, the air was warm. She heard the rustle before she heard them, grass underneath boots and warm wind blowing through a red cape. “Good evening, Dorothea.” 

It still registered as a slight surprise to her, every time the Imperial Princess greeted her for the sake of it. The princess, Dorothea smiled. Edelgard doesn’t ask for songs, she talks to her all the same. 

“Good evening, Edie.” It was something she took the liberty to decide herself, and Edelgard did not protest. _‘Edi_ e’ _rolls off the tongue nicely, doesn’t it?_ She had been rewarded then with a polite, barely-visible smile. “Off somewhere? or did you just finish running another errand?” She was aiming for playful, and prayed it didn’t come off as nosy. 

“We’re heading out for a walk, Hubert and I have some things to discuss and the desk in my room grew tiresome,” she looked at Dorothea, and her eyes seemed to reflect too much light. It was under the darkening sky that Dorothea felt something shake awake and alert in her. She opened her mouth, but before she could say anything Edelgard had said, “You’re tired.” It wasn’t a question.

Dorothea found that odd, she had double checked in the mirror before heading out; no dark circles, no flyaway strands, no wrinkles in her uniform. She made it so nothing was out of place, so no one would notice when she’d spent the entire night before restless. 

“Oh Edie, no. I’m fine.” She smiled and wrinkled her nose. “Sleep may have been a little on the lacking side but I’m fresh as a dove.”

“I see, if you wish to be absent tomorrow I could inform the professor for you and bring you your homework.” 

“Oh, that won’t be necessary,” she said. Wind brushing on her cheek and something, tugging at her senses. She could not tell what. But she appreciated the concern, and in lieu of appreciation she gathered some boldness in her stomach and leaned in, placing a chaste kiss on Edelgard’s cheek. “But thank you.” There was no reaction. 

Dorothea went about her way, and Edelgard and Hubert theirs. They liked the night strolls, she thought of more than one occasion she’d seen them leave the monastery at this time, and later even. Dorothea thought Edelgard would do this with a few extra soldiers to make sure no one crossed their paths, no bandits or such. But she didn’t. It was either with Hubert or just her alone. It’s not like Dorothea was too worried, she’d seen Edelgard cleave through rows of men. It’s just, another image of royalty she had in her mind and had learned in her plays. But Edelgard was not like most of those people, she’d started to realize. 

It’s only later, when she’s tracing her lips for the feel of the other girl’s cheek, trying to elicit that memory, does she recall that Edelgard was not warm. Her cheek was not warm. And Dorothea had been too preoccupied with her own nerves to notice. She pressed her pointer and middle finger to her lips again, and thought of a distant lullaby. 

* * *

The first catch screamed and writhed and screamed again, but Edelgard was quick, silencing it with a swift kiss of teeth to the throat, ripping it out and spraying herself with warm blood. Hubert wrinkled his nose, but said nothing. He knew her to be more elegant. But he also knew tonight how her skin had crawled with a need, how pent up her week had been. He would not deny her her hunger, he’d encourage it.

There was another, and another, and by the time Edelgard was done she was panting, breathing out her mouth but otherwise still. Her eyes went back to normal, Hubert could see. The difference was so slight that hardly anyone could notice it. Less gleaming, less frantic. He stood there while blood dripped down her jacket, smeared her mouth and nose and got into the white of her hair. Satiated, again. 

He handed her the towel he brought with him and she wiped herself down as best as she could, the night had gotten cooler, and Hubert was sure the blood would make Edelgard cold with the wind. When Edelgard drank she was warm again, sensitive to heat and cold once her belly was full and she was herself again. She hadn’t even used the halberd, it was all arms and fangs. Her cravat was ruined. 

“Seteth instructed the professor to double the guards and security, he means to have the whole monastery alert for the Rite of Rebirth. I think, whatever happens would help us a great deal. Perhaps the Holy Mausoleum will be an easy feast, and wether the professor stops them or vanishes in batt-“ She gave him a look, and despite the lack of hunger she was not calm. “We do not benefit from her dying, Hubert.” Edelgard wiped the last of the blood from her lips. 

The tree branches swayed, filtering the light of the moon onto the ground, and in the distance a wolf howls. Edelgard took a deep breath. The Oghma mountains fields teemed with wildlife, and out enough from the monastery Edelgard could do as she willed, preying on sheep and deer and boars. “I doubt they’d be able to actually get Rhea, as soothing as that thought may be. Regardless, I’d rather there be no other casualties.” 

Standing near three animal carcasses, Edelgard signaled that she was ready to leave. The carcasses bore no human marks, if anyone were to come across them they would suspect a brazen beast, if the crows and other animals didn’t devour the remains by then and leave nothing behind. But blood drinking and savagery were two separate things, he wouldn’t do her the dishonor of comparison.

On their walk back Edelgard kept her eyesight focused ahead. Her march was far less rigid, but was laced with an underlying anxiety Hubert had noticed. “Dorothea will be under all our protection, Your Highness, no need to worry about anything untimely.” He knew she did not just mean her, but Hubert knew other things as well, things he kept quiet about. She was not hungry for animal blood only, it seemed. And the muscles of her neck tensing indicated that her hunt this month was far from over. 

“Dorothea..” Her voice trailed and came to a final halt. But Hubert sensed the change in Edelgard, she was hungry again. 

The blood stains on her cape were barely visible, the red mixing with red had concealed it. Edelgard hadn’t drunk human blood in years. He knew this.


	2. Revelations

The incursion was not successful, and the western church’s men not only failed to find the Goddess’s body, but also handed the Sword of the Creator off to their enemy. Edelgard marveled at the sheer power on display when the professor wielded it in her hands and cut through the attackers with unparalleled might. This, this is what they need to win. Seeing it unleashed ignited more determination in Edelgard, that what she laid down could be achieved faster, more efficiently. It’s not that she wanted anyone to needlessly suffer.   


* * *

“Lady Edelgard!” Hubert had shouted when she threw herself in-front of Dorothea, taking the hit with the handle of her axe, then with one swift motion sunk the blade into the attacker’s skull. Dorothea didn’t recall much but the flash of white hair. There had been a spray of blood that made everything all the more revolting, it got into her mouth and made her taste Edelgard’s handiwork. She was already too shocked, her magic didn’t hit him. His armor was magic, his blade bared and ready while she—seconds away from death—was _incapacitated_. Maybe, she thought when the glint of metal came rushing at her, that this was not what she was made for. But Edelgard had interfered fast, too fast in fact, that she tried to remember, wether the princess had been across the room or just a few feet away.

Dorothea looked up at her grateful, and beaten-down enough to not want to get up. Edelgard’s breath was loud, she gave Dorothea her hand, pulled her to her feet and then switched her off to Petra. Petra wasted no time supporting her with one hand and holding her weapon in the other. Dorothea kept drawing in shallow breaths, she watched as Edelgard, fearsome and angry, ran back to where the professor was. She must have thought her weak, so very weak.

That night at the infirmary Manuela kept her company, healing her wounds and her spirit. She threw blood-stained bandages and closed her up nicely. Her hands weren’t as delicate, but were as skilled as her singing had been. And still is, only Dorothea hadn’t heard her in so long.

“Won’t you sing for me?” Dorothea urged, the rush and battle exertion had made her open and raw. She didn’t like this feeling. “You always make me better.”

Manuela looked at her with gentle, assuring eyes; this pain you go through can be elevated, they said. The songstress was nice with almost anyone, but she was especially for her; the orphan girl she plunked off the dirty streets of Enbarr. Hers. “Sure, sweetheart.” And that made her breathing go back to normal.

She was still all bruises and rush and could not get the image of Edelgard standing above her out of her head. Like the characters of old myths; for how strong she was, for how dashing, for how it made every breath in her stop and raise in gratitude. Dashing. Edelgard’s image didn’t leave for one minute since that morning. Dorothea suspected this state will last for much longer.

When she was done, at the door Dorothea encountered Edelgard. “You’re here.” Dorothea was surprised, she couldn’t have waited that long to come down here if she was injured, could she?

“I was-“ Edelgard stopped when she saw Manuela, “-coming to ask about the general situation, Manuela, what’s the damage?”

Manuela looked between them and told Edelgard it was kind of her to come down here. Most of the students are done and Dorothea was a darling, you need not worry, she said, and smiled, as sweet as summer cherry. Dorothea, very stupidly, blushed at the compliment.

“I didn’t thank you quite enough, Edie.” Dorothea said, with more breath than was necessary, and Edelgard looked pleased with herself. The way it bloomed on her face made Dorothea think of first blossoms and childhood praise. Manuela finished wiping her hands after cleaning them in the basin beside her station, she then approached them. The sky was darkening, and the light inside the infirmary was fading. The professor said something to Edelgard in a hushed tone and Dorothea tried to excuse herself. Edelgard looked like she had more to say, or like she had been caught saying too much. She figured Edelgard must be here on special business, that she shouldn’t be bothering them. But just as she was going Edelgard’s whole body tensed, if she hadn’t been close enough she would never have seen it. But she did; jaw and neck and fist. Dorothea had her fill of looking, but quickly tried to act like it was nothing. Thankfully, so did Edelgard. The hairs on Dorothea’s arms had stood, she could not describe it as anything other than being suddenly thrust into spotlight. “Are you sure you’re okay now?” Edelgard said.

Manuela gave a staged gasp, “Of course she is, Edelgard, she was in my hands.” All with an added palm to the chest, for flair.

“I’m not doubting you, professor, how could I when you’re our finest healer?” Edelgard’s tone was more serious than jesting and it made Dorothea snort. She said _our_ , like she meant to say _my_ , looking straight into Manuela’s eyes like she meant it very much. “Oh, Edie, I’m fine.” She placed her hand on Edelgard’s shoulder. It was taught and unrelaxed. Dorothea bid them goodnight and retired to her room.

* * *

“Let me help you clean up,” Edelgard said when they were alone. She started with the tools spread out on the table, then the empty vulreraries and finally all the discarded and bloody bandages littering the floor. “I have your new batch of elixirs ready for you, Edelgard, just give me a moment.” Manuela had been let it on some of Edelgard’s conditions and state. Not- not everything. Edelgard did not fear people knowing, she just did not want it.

“Thank you,” Edelgard said, slipping something in her pocket whilst Manuela went to fetch the elixirs from the cabinet. She had been using them ever since she arrived at the monastery, and before that the ones provided by the palace healer. Something to keep her strength and ward off the worst of her affliction. Nothing would subdue the crest of flames, but her ravenousness could be..helped. Most days.

Back in her room Edelgard pulled out the bandage and handkerchief and sat on the edge of her bed. Ran her fingers then brought it up to her lips, she let the tip of her tongue have just a taste, a small, chaste taste. But it was enough to blow her eyes wide open and have her heartbeat pick up. She wanted to shove the whole thing in her mouth, swallow it whole and let it fill her up. Salvation was a worn down sign she’d passed long ago, she was knee deep in this now. She breathed it in and kept on breathing until she started to pant. And then her tongue snaked out, running across Dorothea’s now dried blood. Lapping at it like a pup at their mother’s teat. Edelgard was ravenous, but it was different, this felt different. And the smell was enough and not at the same time.

Edelgard was lapping uselessly at the cloth when she shifted onto her back, her right hand pulling up the hem of her shirt, then pushing down the fabric of her shorts. It’s not a shock when she finds herself rubbing furiously at her slit, not even waiting to wet it with her slick, it’s not a shock, when Dorothea is the only thing she can see, the only scent she can recall—rely on to get her through this. Edelgard’s wetness was growing by the second, she kept sliding her fingers up and down her nub, then sideways, then in circles building up so much tension she thought she could break. Edelgard got forceful and rough on herself. It felt a little like losing herself. Losing what? Her fingers dug deeper into her tight cunt, there was no rhythm or reason to her movements anymore. All she could see was Dorothea, all she could feel was Dorothea. Maddening songstress, infuriatingly beautiful, with a scent that made threads of thought jumble in her brain.

But she had to get it out of her system. Her breathing was becoming more shallow and her muscles grew tight and corded. She didn’t relent, even as her cunt was starting to feel like the center from which she would pull herself apart. And just as the slick walls seized against her fingers her moan came out in the form of a beg, in the form of a name. Edelgard let out a deep breath, she smoothed out her hair, pulled her shirt back on properly and readjusted her shorts. She was going to be late for her night briefing with Hubert.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaa well. Here ya go hope you like it!


	3. Lesser knowledge

In her dreams Dorothea offers her her neck, vulnerable and hot and in her dreams Edelgard licks it instead of biting down. There is too much restraint in her, she knows, yet Edelgard decided on choosing one or the other; she would try distancing herself completely, or she would indulge by means of closeness. She would try and see which one worked better for her predicament.

“You’re frowning!” She’d said to her, breathless and sing-song like, and immediately her muscles would relax. Something about wrinkles and cute faces and Edelgard laughed. It was getting better, she was no longer having visions of her bleeding and broken and at her mercy. Her usual night terrors returned instead.

Any time her senses alerted her of Dorothea’s presence Edelgard strived to beat it normal. She is here, _yes_. She is inviting, _yes_. She gleams around everyone and shines brighter when you juxtaposition her with anyone in her vicinity, _get used to it_. Eventually Edelgard molds herself back to normal, or a resemblance of it.

When the bulk of her classes are attended and everything she put to motion tracks into unfolding, when they need only wait for the destruction of everything old, Edelgard lets herself breathe. Everything new will simply forcibly replace all this rotted mold, then she could think of a permanent solution to her crests.

It took a lot to keep up with the damage they were inflicting on her circulation. With a constant need to drink to supply herself with blood, instead of what was being boiled inside her own body, unable to withstand the pressure of _Flames_ , of _Seiros_.

It was hellish at first, the following days and weeks and months, with a constant thirst and fear of the unknown, fear of what they’d done to her. She was transformed and her siblings destroyed, it wasn’t too hard to comprehend after.

But now Edelgard thinks only in clearheadedness and in change. In implementing and renewal. There’ll be time to whimper and despair—and mourn—after the war, there’ll be time for everything. And to take care of herself when all is said and done. If there wasn’t—it did not matter, as long as she reached where she aimed her eyes those many years ago. As long as her promises came to life, her own life was expendable, in her hand-forged world.

* * *

She found the days edging her closer to Dorothea. Dorothea would either throw around words that were meant to fluster Edelgard, or spend chunks of her time vying for Edelgard’s company, it made her think, a lot, of what she meant by all this. If her flirtatious remarks were standing on rocks or quick sand.

But Dorothea seemed elusive as she was open. Edelgard had trained herself against her heart, naturally. It was okay to wait, and to possibly never find an answer. She could keep this up indefinitely. Watch Dorothea flirt with countless nobles, see her come to her as well. And what she found in the midst of all that was unrelenting need. It spilled from human to inhuman, switching back and forth between the need for her company and the need for her skin.

The day’s sun spilled heat onto the training grounds, Edelgard took a step back then pushed forward again, catching her opponent against his balance. It had been a long training session, and Edelgard surged forward with the intent to end it. She used her axe to disarm him, sending the weapon flying and out of the student’s hand.

It wasn’t exactly a leveled fight, not with the just-average skills he had displayed, but Edelgard appreciated the workout nonetheless. Out the corner of her eye Edelgard saw Dorothea. The heat had her showing even more cleavage than usual, it was either that or the abundance of audience Dorothea knew would be there.

Edelgard used her handkerchief to wipe the sweat off her brow, using the small concealment as a sort of reprieve, taking in a deep breath and steadying herself against a sensation of fire. It’s rigorous work. Dorothea saw her and immediately waved, her expression blooming into animation, it sent a unique set of sparks up Edelgard’s left ribcage. Unbidden, she could hardly remember the last time she had an infatuation. And when Dorothea came closer Edelgard could see the sweat trickling down between her breasts.

Dorothea had just came over from talking to Sylvain, her exertion from the heat made Edelgard imagine the ice room back at the Enbarr Palace. She would like that, Edelgard thought, she herself liked it well enough following her experimentations. When all was said and done her body could not withstand heat, back then she could not have imagined this girl who would be on the streets fending for herself. They were at their essence the same, in their conception as children of Enbarr, lonely, frightened little girls with no protection.

Edelgard was far, far from that now, and Dorothea bloomed better than any flower here at the Academy. But what Edelgard saw was a subject that should have been protected, that she should protect now, even from herself. From anyone who would try and prey on her, in any form. But it wasn’t her place or within her boundaries. Dorothea smiled at her.

Looking at Edelgard as Edelgard looked up at her, surge of girlish fluster running around in her and somewhere in a corner the hideous side of Edelgard wanted to—

“You’re going to participate in the tournament?” Dorothea asked.

“Yes.” Edelgard said, removing her chest armor up over her head and then laying it beside her feet. “The professor asked me to.”

“You’ll be marvelous, you always are. I feel sorry for the other contestants, they don’t stand a chance.”

“Thank you.” Edelgard searched her eyes for flattery she did not find, she meant every word, it seemed. “There’s a few that I’ll heed for, Hilda is powerful enough to challenge me, so is Dimitri.” Her eyes focused. It was true, she didn’t doubt herself, they would pose a challenge; one that she’d plow through anyway.

“I know you’ll make it too exciting to miss, Edie. I remember you at the Holy Tomb, you made me lose my words.” She stopped for a second, and then, “I ought to write this into a play, don’t you think? Galant Edie lending a hand to some common songstress, a show of how noble. They’ll love that.” The blush from the workout deepened on Edelgard’s face, and just as she was about to reply Ferdinand stepped to them, taking Dorothea’s arm into his own and greeting them both.

“I’ll battle whoever wins, and I’ll battle you. This would certainly put things into perspective, don’t you think, Edelgard?”

Dorothea swatted at him, “Don’t pester her, come on, let’s get to our seats.” As she left Dorothea blew a kiss as a wish for luck, and all Edelgard could think of was how no one could override the smell of Dorothea’s blood in the air.

The tournament concluded with Edelgard’s victory, with the professor there to applaud her along with everyone else. It all shined brightly in her eyes, and after Byleth had left to attend a meeting with the archbishop, Edelgard kept an image of the Sword of the Creator in her mind, as she saw her professor talk to Rhea in smiles she reserved for her.

* * *

“They’ve taken Flayn. Seteth will lose whatever’s left of his mind.” Hubert said, and Edelgard flattened another parchment onto her desk. She kept her expression under control, picking up a quill and using it to underline something. “Rhea will definitely reiterate.”

“I thought I told them not to do anything like this,” Edelgard’s hatred of the Slithers wasn’t subsidized, it gripped at her from the bottom of her throat. “Not that she is an object of interest further than leverage against Seteth should it come to that, but they don’t get to play and torture as they please. Find her.”

When asked about the urgency of the situation, Edelgard didn’t show too much alarm. Hubert bowed and took his leave, letting the princess go about her work and him his own. It was still early morning, and the temperature inside her quarters was brisk, Edelgard frowned. She liked coming down from her frenzies, when she’d be more focused and more relaxed, her body temperature reverting back to its normal state. But that also meant she had to be more mindful of how she treated her body.

She got up and threw logs of wood into the fireplace, not reacting when a splinter gets caught in her skin, just in the center of one of the scars in her palm. Edelgard plucked it, thinks of roses and spikes, of how the palace garden’s red roses would sting when she caught her skin on one of their protruding thorns, retribution for plucking them.

There’s wax from her letter seals spilled on her desk, two drops or three, it’s hardened by the time she touches it and runs her finger over the smooth surface. The red catching the light cleanly. She had passed by the night before to Dorothea’s room, looming soundlessly behind her door and trying to think clearly for once in that night. She traced the wood of the doorframe before leaving, her reasoning failing to do anything else. _This was unsustainable_ , her body told her. _This was sustainable,_ her better nature told her.

By noon Hubert returned, brow thinly covered in sweat from the sun. He’d been into town meeting and commanding, vying to get a full picture to bring back to his princess. He filled her in and then they headed towards the dining hall.

She found it teeming and electric, each table hunched close to each other to whisper and speculate and pass around what they heard. _The girl’s dead. She’s being experimented on. No, Seteth’s sister is being used as bait!_ Some with cautious and fearful eyes, while others just in it for the gossip and the promise of something new.

Edelgard found an empty table for them to sit. The professor didn't ask her to lunch, as she’d been prone to do. Edelgard with Lysithea, Edelgard and Ferdinand, Edelgard with Hubert of course. She’d made a habit of asking Claude too, but Edelgard knew Byleth was off looking for leads, and food gatherings would be postponed for the time being.

Biting into her steak Edelgard heard someone shuffle up to her before she heard her name on excited lips, ones that were conscious of being too loud, these were sensitive times, after all. “Dorothea.” Edelgard swallowed and then placed her tongue between her molars, mouth closed.

“Oh Edie it’s so good to see you,” Dorothea was flustered as if she had stopped by from a run. Edelgard tried to smell her, she found that she had been between the grass and heat, and someone’s body. “With everything that’s happening. Ah, are you two busy? I’m sorry, I’ll leave.”

The _no_ rushing out of Edelgard was immediate, and so was the _sit down, please_. They ate together, along with Hubert, and Edelgard folded in her mind wether to talk about inconsequential things to lighten up for Dorothea, or say something heftier.

She spent a few minutes in silence until Dorothea spoke up and crashed her train of thought. “You’ve found something about Flayn?” She asked, her question laced with concern. Edelgard could’t help but stare at Dorothea’s open expression.

It spoke of her and how soft her pulse was. Dorothea was, like most people, easily moved. But it felt different, looked different on her, like everything she did was more sincere, more real. Like no one had ever felt compassion before Dorothea Arnault did. Edelgard felt acutely aware of her own skin.

Telling her everything she knew would be unwise, an admission of what she did in the shadows and darkness. Telling her about who she aligned herself with will do nothing to exonerate Edelgard from what has befallen the Academy since she came, either. But holding onto her silence felt immense, suddenly. She needed to steady herself. Where was all this want for honesty coming from?

“I hope this ends soon.” Dorothea murmured when she thought the lack of a reply as a lack of news. Edelgard put down her fork and turned to give her her full attention.

“It will.” Edelgard said.

It’s not long til news reaches them that night, that Manuela Casagranda has gone missing. And that whoever took Flayn was likely behind this too. Everyone had a say in what they thought was their motive. Edelgard quickly went from being annoyed to simmering and livid. So much that her full-on headaches returned, grasped her and held on tight. She’d gotten worse ones over the years, absolutely had to lie down before, and clutch her skull and squeeze as hard as she could without breaking anything that could be broken. This was not nearly as severe, but Edelgard felt unwell.They’re hitting her by doing this, she thought, even if they didn’t know it yet.

She paced in her room for a while, with Hubert offering her a list of suspects and her armor. Edelgard found her feet taking her past the dormitories, out to the gardens where she found Dorothea, shaking. She opened her mouth to speak but then remembered who Manuela is to Dorothea, to the orphan stage girl. Edelgard relied on Manuela, but Dorothea thrived because of her. The reliance was shared, it seemed. There was need for drastic action, now. 

Dorothea grabbed Edelgard’s arm and pulled her abruptly to herself. The hug took Edelgard by enough surprise that she did not react at first. Dorothea rested her face in the side of Edelgard’s head, her nose and mouth and cheek in Edelgard’s hair and Edelgard could feel her pulse. It’s the closest she’s been to her and Edelgard has to press her nails into her own hand to hold her ground, Dorothea’s neck was right in front of her. Edelgard Dorothea hold her briefly before pulling back. “I’m sorry, I’m so scared,” Dorothea took a sharp breath, “I can help, I’ll look for her with you all, I’ll give anything in exchange for her, Edie?” She looked patient, waiting for a reply when Edelgard was already setting in her mind her course of action.

”I’ll make sure,” she said, slow with every word, “That she comes back.”

There was so much sacrifice to be passed around. It seemed. Focused on her and Edelgard’s brain fired into action. Being away from Dorothea gained her nothing, being close to her gave her a reprieve she didn’t know she could have. Edelgard needed her healer back, she needed to get Dorothea’s old friend back.

Later when she has Dorothea sprawled out beneath her, when she has her completely at her mercy and trembling from need, she allows herself to delve deeper into this train of thought, of power and balance and sanction. On what it takes to bring her down now, as she shoves her fingers deeper into Dorothea and Dorothea moans, load and clear. But between that moment and her current one Edelgard feels something unravel, when her hope for control unravels itself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much has happened this past week, i hope you all are well. Hope you all liked the chapter, let me know what you think!


	4. Deeds to be done

The search continued on for days to no avail. By the end of the week Dorothea’d lost half her hope, which made the princess double her efforts, calling for extra troops from the Empire to come and aid in the search. The classes had resumed normally, despite the close hit to the Archbishop’s circle, she insisted that the school year must go on along with their efforts. “The prof— the _students_ must learn these things if they intend to help us, there are things they must learn,” She had said, and Edelgard did not nod or shake her head. Life must go on, she knew that, slowing down is not an option. But by now her tremors were getting ahold of her again. The palace healer’s mixture of pain medicine and crest stabilizers was an old one, one she’d grown desensitized to, she had no choice but to see this through.

* * *

In her confines her other face showed up, the one she used to deal with her underground affairs. She had the Flame Emperor meet with those she despised so much, to ask of the whereabouts of those who went missing, but nothing. The Death Knight callous and unruly, he puffed at the accusation, he would not trouble himself with unworthy prey and scour the monastery for healers he had no use of, they should ask those other no good rats they deal with. At last when calling upon Arundel he told her it was a group that cut ties with him that did this, and he had no interest in pursuing them at all. But no one person was telling her the truth.

“I warn you, and don’t take this lightly, do not take me lightly.”

If he had felt any fear he did not show it, but his fingers flexed around nothing. It seemed like he was weighing facing off with her or giving her what she wants. What he had to do with this, she fiercely wanted to know, but that wasn’t something he’d give up, he gave her the location of the most visited hide-outs, and nothing more at the start.

From that point it takes Edelgard less than a day to retrieve them. Before Arundel had left he asked why a masked anarchist would even be interested in two Academy filths? She answered that she had to cut down on her loose ends, citing the Archbishop, that this would certainly put her hot on their tail, much worse than before, and their motions would all collapse. She didn’t care if he thought it was a dramatization, all that mattered was the end goal. “I’m sending one of my men, they’ll throw the prisoners off at any hellhole they no longer attend, you can snitch to your contacts then.”

* * *

Flayn had been bruised all over, cuts baring the hands of surgeons. Manuela was out cold too, with far less damage. The search concluded without a lead. No one knew who took them, but soon enough it became clear why only to a select few. Though Rhea could not have that information out in the open, that an underground society had conducted Nabatean experimentation, that these people even operate, let alone have a reach this deep into the heart of their fortress. Edelgard noticed the professor always away from her quarters, Rhea had to be gearing up for something. Edelgard debated trying to subtly extract this information from Byleth, wether she would say it freely or grow suspicious. She headed to the infirmary to check on Manuela instead. 

“She hasn’t woken up yet,” Dorothea said as soon as she saw Edelgard come through the door, Edelgard had grown accustomed to always finding her here, sitting by Manuela’s still side. “No other troubles, though. Thankfully.” That last part was followed by a lightness of voice, like Dorothea could will the situation into something positive if she just traced it with a lesser evil. _She’s in a magic induced coma, but breathing okay!_

The place hit her with something almost nauseous. “I need her awake,” Edelgard hadn’t anticipated the edges, of her voice, of her nerves. She hadn’t anticipated the feeling of collapse in her gut either. This was not the time for this, she had just fed off by cliffside and now her blood was boiling her in her body. But it’d be hard for anyone to notice any change in her, not with how well she keeps her masks from falling.

“I—I think they’re trying all they can, it’ll wear soon enough, Edie.”

Dorothea, however, was setting her off like something vengeful. There must be a way, she reeled, to relieve this without pulling her into a whirlwind. Like a heat threatening to make her catch ablaze at any moment. She needed to leave, immediately. 

“I’ll talk to Linhardt,” Edelgard blurted, a quick, reasonable escape. That unfortunately didn’t work, Dorothea was up on her heels in an instant, telling her she’d come as well.

Dorothea’s entire form reeked of fatigue, she must have been down here for hours, but it didn’t stop Edelgard for feeling her own gaze land heavily on her, the curve of her body, the edge at the top her boots where her thighs peeked from beneath her skirt, or where her curls met her neck. Brown on cream white skin and Edelgard’s vision came into clear focus. She held her gaze then on Dorothea’s eyes for what must have been uncomfortably long.

Edelgard straightened her back, gearing herself to come up with a political run she had to deal with, but deflated the thought when her baser instincts kicked in and seemed to grab her by the arm.

“Walk with me then, Dorothea.”

It was almost sundown when they went through the grounds towards the dorm rooms, but still light enough in the sky, Dorothea saw a bird fly overhead, whistling, she started humming a tune of her own. It was all picturesque, and Edelgard felt like she was being stuffed with coals.

It’s before they’re half way there does she collapse on the ground, clutching at her arm and struggling on her knees. Dorothea let out a cry and got down beside her, feeding into this thought: this girl is with you. “Edie, Edelgard. What’s wrong?” But all Dorothea got as a reply was the shake of her head.

Edelgard’s eyes looked bloodshot, Dorothea looked around, probably to get help, yell for someone, but there was no one around. They were all alone. “Edie, sweetie, let me use Heal on you, Edie where is it? Your stomach?”

Edelgard knew she couldn’t call for Hubert, he was still be in town, and getting to Linhardt then having to explain to him would take time, she needed something right then. Something urgent.

She could surrender this to Dorothea, then. Leave herself in her arms. But just as she was about to agree a sharp pain shot through her, blinding, heaving. Edelgard bit down on her left forearm, hard. Before she could think there was blood spilling out of the bite, black and hot, too hot that when Dorothea touched it she cried out too.

Edelgard let the blood spill for a few seconds, relishing in the relief it gave her, before conjuring up a small Fire spell. Dorothea then slapped her hand down, forcing her to stop before trying to sear herself. She was frantic, trying to comprehend the scene happening in front of her, but Edelgard could hardly explain. Her eyes were glazing over, and as she hissed through Dorothea’s healing spell all she could train her eyes on was Dorothea’s exposed neck. Her jugular barely pronounced on her skin, her now sweating skin. Edelgard knew not to even look at her artery, biting into that would be irreversible. But a vein, that would do. Edelgard caught the thought and bit down on her own tongue instead, but that wouldn’t do, she could bite it off, instead she yanked her cravat and stuffed it in her mouth. 

Dorothea was still staring wide-eyed at the the wound in Edelgard’s arm, it healed and closed off then. But the dark blood stains were everywhere. It looked like she was trying to find a non-insane response to it all, Edelgard couldn’t take it, she whimpered, sound muffled by the smooth fabric. Dorothea patted the sweat on Edelgard’s forehead, took her face in her hands and slowly started to pull the cravat out. But Edelgard shook her head. No. Dorothea paid that no mind, finding a point to reach Edelgard at, she pulled the cravat like she was pulling a prize from her body. The silk slid out of Edelgard’s mouth dark with saliva and tore up a little. Dorothea set it aside.

“Dorothea, please leave,” she managed, this was as humiliating as it was risky, Edelgard hadn’t allowed anyone to see her this desperate to feed. She had to get Dorothea away from her before she sunk teeth in her.

“I’m here, Edie, please tell me what’s going on.” The sun had set, and the light was slowly fading, Dorothea’s hands were still cupping her cheek. “Or at least how I could help. Please.”

There was no easy way to tell her what was going on inside her body, nor was there a feasible way to say anything without feeling like she’s peeling off skin, letting someone in on her tragedy felt impossible, it should be impossible.

Gathering her words she spoke roughly, in such a low voice that anyone observing the scene from afar would think they were lovers exchanging romantic whispers. “It’s burning me, my crest. It’s burning me.” Edelgard didn’t cry, despite the shining in her eyes she did not cry. And for nothing but the need to have something in her mouth she took her hand, made a fist and started to bite on that too.

“Stop, Edie, look at me, what can I do to stop it, stop it from burning?” Edelgard looked at herincredulously, nothing could stop it. Not yet. She would have to give up her body in order to restore it, be subjugated to more experiments more treatments more people. That could all wait, but this, right now, this could not. 

Edelgard let her jaw slack around her fist, revealing her sharpened teeth, fangs that grew a little when she went frantic, the small dots of blood on her fingers, and Dorothea looked at her dumbfounded. It was a bad idea. “I need—” she said, with all the shame she could muster.

It was obvious Dorothea was too bewildered to fully absorb what was going on, but it settled in pretty quickly. “Edie, your—teeth,” she checked to see if there was anyone else, still alone. She breathed in. “ _How_ Edie, what—”

Edelgard gave her a flat look, it should be more than obvious by now. She didn’t want to spell it out, she would if she had to, if Dorothea made her. It was only a matter of how much Dorothea would make her say. I need to drink, I need to drink your blood, have you sprawled because I’m _no longer_ _human. I don’t know anymore the people who died for me, and I can’t remember the last time I dreamt of my mother._

She had to spell it out, she could so this. But when it finally bubbled up to her throat a student came into view. They were no longer alone. The thought in itself gave Edelgard so much restraint, that she immediately wanted to retch for how disgusting all of this was, for how disgusting she was being. It didn’t stop the fire.

“Look at me Edelgard, and speak.” Dorothea was loud and clear now, less off-balanced when she saw Edelgard recede again. Edelgard’s parched lips, she licked her lips and said plainly, that she needed to feed on blood. Out there, now. It was out there, the need.

Dorothea’s eyes blew wide again, something that looked more: she is this situation, and this is terrible. Then fear, there was probably fear too. She took Edelgard’s arm, lifted her rather roughly, and lead her back on their path to the dorms. Edelgard said nothing, let herself be half-pulled, half-dragged across their school grounds. When they arrived it was at Dorothea’s room, not hers. The door was opened and Edelgard lead in. Edelgard, in her haze, fixated on the purse of Dorothea’s lips, serious and unusual. There had been an unusual talk. Again, she felt the pang, doubling in her loins, the rise of trouble again, there had to be a way to saw this out of herself. For Manuela to wake right this second, stop this, save her. For what it looked like now, as she saw Dorothea bunch up her loose hair, flip it to the side, baring her skin that Dorothea’s neck would have to do, it would do. It wouldn’t save her, though.

“Go ahead. I trust you, Edie, go ahead.” This seemed to happen too quickly, but Edelgard was done waiting. Putting her lips first, taking in a solid breath, letting it out on Dorothea’s skin. They were standing so close. They were doing something new. Edelgard saw the small hairs on her neck rise before she went in.

“Ah. Ow.” Dorothea’s pain-filled moans did nothing to discourage or even sate her. Her fangs dived a good space into Dorothea’s flesh, and the sucking motion she did, which was reserved at first, got louder and sloppier. Edelgard knew, from experience, what the cut-off point was, when too much was too much. Edelgard sucked a little harder, pulling skin between her lips. Dorothea would need a fair amount of makeup later on. But now: moaning still, “ _Oh_ , ah, Edie, Edie enough.” She was quickly approaching that threshold. But she would stop before it. When Dorothea kept on aching. Letting out a cry, she put her hand on Edelgard’s jaw and push—pushed away. Edelgard had enough sense not to lock her bite in, and let her head be shoved lightly, softly away. Dorothea was crying, not—not the accusatory kind, but the beautiful single tears sliding down. Her chest was heaving. Her hand was still on Edelgard’s jaw, having titled her all the way into an uncomfortable position, Edelgard didn’t dare move.

She glanced at Edelgard’s bloodied lips, her free hand then went up to where her neck had been brutalized. She rubbed at it, smearing the blood up and down the side of her neck and letting out a sigh. She still had Edelgard there, and when Edelgard spoke up she apologized. She saw Dorothea come down from her discomfort, and couldn’t help herself from pushing forward, pushing until her face was below Dorothea’s ear, just above the bite, and stood there. Their sides touched and Edelgard’s breath came out calmer than it’d been all day. She felt boneless. They didn’t say a word for a while, like Edelgard was debating going at it again, or like Dorothea was debating letting her. It wouldn’t do to try again, she would suck Dorothea dry. Right then however, it was a quiet apology, letting herself be on Dorothea’s skin without it hurting, _I can touch without harm, can you see?_

Dorothea closed her eyes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaa sorry for the wait. Enjoy! (Dorothea, despite the ouchie, did too)  
> Let me know what you think!


	5. Absent things

As soon as Edelgard left—immediately after her first and only taste—Dorothea let out a throttled howl. This certainly wasn’t happening, this absolutely wasn’t happening. She searched for her wash-basin. It was in the exact place it always has been, but Dorothea wasn’t truly in her body, or mind for that. She washed her neck, cleaning it of the blood Edelgard didn’t lick off. And then her face, too. The water trickled down her chin. She stared at the reflection in the lovely, indented mirror she had hanged on the wall above it. A little luxury for the little girl she was, she was a brave girl, wasn’t she? She’d be brave now. But Dorothea couldn’t stop rubbing the cloth over and over on her face, down her throat. She realized, that she felt impossibly unclean, and needed instead to bathe. 

She would go to the washrooms, but unsure wether she’d be able to make it that far. If her legs would cooperate, her nerves would not. She needed to rest, the process of cleaning could wait til morning. 

She went to bed feeling weighted, as if instead of taking out of her volume of blood Edelgard had added to it. Dizzy, Dorothea knew, that that must have accompanied the freakishness of it, and had nothing to do with the weight of her bodily fluids. 

It should have felt guilty; being this upset, almost filling with filth in her heart and all this relating to Edelgard. She was still and first, the princess of all Adrestia. But the guilt had fraternized itself with the repulsion she was feeling and repulsion, for that night, won out. She had to remind herself that she chose this, that she offered her neck freely, and that, painful as it was, there was nothing amazing about the act, just unbelievable. 

It wasn’t regret she wasn’t filling up with but semblance of fear. What if this wasn’t enough? What if she came back for more, what if she came back until Dorothea couldn’t provide again and had to deny her, and it got ahold of her?  made Edelgard lose her steel-control?

She found that a hard image to conjure: Edelgard von Hresvelg losing control. She looked like the type who generated it endlessly for herself, gave it to other people, and took it over with the hard, firm grasp of her fist when she wanted to. 

It was hard to think of Edelgard irrationally, not when her leadership of them had been that straight-sighted and steady. But still, what she had seen tonight, in weirdness and anger, and weakness—she thought of Edelgard on the battlefield too, merciless, taught. She tried to make sense of these things together like a child’s toys and worn out chess. That, along with the information of Edelgard’s crest, and the feel of her teeth buried an inch in her neck. 

Her teeth in her neck and her lips gently on the skin outside, a timid, mannered guest. Unlike the intrusive other part of Edelgard’s mouth. 

After Dorothea had to warm herself in bed, bringing her hands to smooth over her arms and stomach. The way she would do on an especially cold Enbarr night, trying to sooth herself to sleep. She didn’t want to touch the wound again, she knew she’d have to douse it with powder the following day in order to keep it from people’s eyes. But it also felt foreign to her. Space claimed by someone else. 

She would have to dismiss that idea, only she had a claim on her own body. And giving things freely, by her will, still left her remembering the bite of sharp teeth. And that despite herself, and despite the confusion of her gut, her cunt was feeling things of its own. Building on what attraction she had for her classmate. Dorothea did her best to ignore it and instead focus on the soundlessness of her room. Edelgard didn’t care about her cunt, after all, just her young red blood.

* * *

Dorothea found herself avoiding Edelgard. Skipping out on classes, citing one issue or another to the professor, who would just nod silently. That would be no problem, she said. In the dining hall she’d make company with either Mercedes, or Ingrid, or both. Petra was also still orbiting her, so were the rest of the Black Eagles except for Edelgard and Hubert. Dorothea figured Edelgard had told him what happened in her quarters, and wondered briefly if she should start to worry.

She tried to think of how her actions could be interpreted as harm, but found the idea stuck, she couldn’t—and wouldn’t. Still, it made her anxious to be under scrutiny from him, even if they got along well on normal days. 

Edelgard did not stop her to talk, what information that needed to be discussed was discussed to the group at large. Dorothea tried, tried to entertain the notion that Edelgard thought nothing of it, that it wasn’t Edelgard being cold, or worse, embarrassed. Whenever Dorothea spotted Edelgard all that feeling would race in, she wished it would at least ask for permission, her heart wasn’t holding an open invitation. It felt like it, yet. 

But it wasn’t like she had any moment where she would forget. She had her fair share of observing operas with sinister figures and blood suckers. And, despite not coming across any, despite stories such as these taking on the status of myths, Dorothea could only be so shocked; there were worse things she’d come face to face fighting alongside the professor. 

Edelgard was not sinister, to her knowledge—no. She was not, just incredibly present. Dorothea had Edelgard on her mind often before, but now it had become constant. Pivoting from dreaming to something nameless. From timid, abashed fancy, to—

She had given herself, if she even knew what that meant. 

* * *

It takes a little while for Manuela to come back to them, and when she does it was as if the monastery’s held breath was finally let in the air. An exhale from a dead building of bricks. But maybe that was just what Dorothea was feeling. She’d knew that Edelgard would be visiting the professor again. Manuela was up and raring again, with Dorothea’s praises dying between her teeth. She was never one to thank the Goddess, she wasn’t about to start now.

They are gathered for the month’s mission briefing when Dorothea really sees Edelgard again. Byleth announces it: Miklan Gautier is the latest sacrifice that the Archbishop asks of them, blesses them to fight. She looked at the princess assessing the information given to her, if she has anything to say she keeps it to herself. It always struck her that Edelgard was someone drenched in doubt. Non that concerned her own self; but that concerned the outer world. What Edelgard believes is scrutinized, what she does not believe is doubly so. It won’t do you to relay things on her and expect her to simply absorb it as is.

Dorothea did not suspect it be tied to an un-expendable ego, or to simple royal suspicion: this tenseness and second-guessing had a rightful seat in Edelgard’s mind. How could she, guarded, brilliant person not be weary? Dorothea already saw the assessing of the right stance in Edelgard’s eyes. And then later in her murmurs to Hubert.

For now Dorothea tried to strip and un-strip the value of herself in another way, she wanted to be told by Edelgard why it had to be her, or wether seemingly bad circumstance was the only reason it was her at all. But she dreaded that knowledge too, she dreaded being confronted and then cowering. Edelgard would not like that. Edelgard hated cowardice. 

But it had the thrumming effect beneath her nails,  she wanted to know what it had tasted like, to Edelgard. She’d had enough thinking what violation she should or should not feel. Curiosity had returned to the flow of her mind again. And curiosity begged her for different things.

Curiosity—she had to get back to other thoughts now; how she ever wished to consolidate Sylvain. The price of avoiding tragedy yourself is that other people will still go through it, and watching from the sidelines, as sedating as it is, did not mean that comfort’s what’s waiting for her. She reminds herself that she owes little to nothing, but he is her friend. And she must help her friends. 

It makes for a grand scene. Sylvain drunk, as drunk as he possibly could be, thrashing and shouting and cursing at the world and the Goddess herself and his father’s prick. “Brought us into the world didn’t it, didn’t it?” He slurred at a tense audience of friends, all trying to get a hold of his bleeding heart and failing. “His cock gave me the crest and skipped over the dear older brother, so the dear older brother is no longer welcome. He gets no such grace,” Another swing, full-bodied and unsteady, “No grace at all.” Is the last thing said before the pint in his hand is thrown violently on the floor and splintered, prompting a punch to Sylvain’s slack jaw by Felix’s hand. Dorothea, speechless through the whole thing. 

She intended to get to him, but felt a light pressure on her shoulder, a hand holding her back. It was Edelgard. Dorothea takes the order,  _stay_. Stay put. Edelgard sees the following events, mirrored in her eyes are the rest of the Blue Lions breaking it up, the closeness of their bodies and their shared anguish. And Dorothea, Dorothea saw the dancing of the candlelight in Edelgard’s pristine hair. 

She wanted to rip some of it out, just a little. Dorothea held the image of hardened, invincible Edelgard arching writhing under her grip on her beautiful hair. The hand on her shoulder brought her back down, she’s standing on the sidelines now, still willing the fear out of her body, feeling Edelgard close to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very sorry for taking this long with it. Hopefully will keep a better pace in upcoming chapters.


	6. Take upon your heart

“We’re leaving for Faerghus by dawn, go get some rest,” Edelgard said, they were still in the dining hall. Dedue and Ingrid managed to break off the fight and escort Sylvain away.

Edelgard’s palm on her shoulder had been firm and gentle, but there was no mistaking it: Edelgard did not want her to go to help Sylvain.

She took her hand back, Edelgard was, it seemed, insensitive to people’s weaknesses. Or she wanted Dorothea to be alert for the trip, maybe she expected her to—maybe it was just her slipping into her commanding nature. Dorothea nodded and left, brushing past Edelgard, half-waiting for a reaction, half-wanting to just— _test it_. But nothing; she did not jump on her, or pounce, or grab her by the arm and pin her against her body.

In her room Dorothea felt the overdue delirium, it was supposed to hit her earlier, she had wanted Edelgard to do something to her, despite swearing to herself that it was unnerving to be around her.

She also wanted to go take Sylvain in her arms, lull him to sleep, but instead she listened to Edelgard. Long overdue, in her room Dorothea took her face in her hands and cried the tears between the gaps of her fingers.   
  


* * *

They set off before first light, Edelgard and the professor were still arguing when she met with them at the monastery gates. Byleth was told to excuse Sylvain from joining the mission by Edelgard. He was emotionally liable and volatile, she said, and there was no need for him to see them take down his brother.

Byleth, on the other hand, wanted to accept his request. He had asked to go, that was his wish. But in the end she was overruled. Despite the lack of choice for Sylvain, Dorothea agreed to the logic behind Edelgard’s words. Edelgard was nothing if not logical.

Riding all on horseback through their path, Dorothea rode a brown rouncey, while Edelgard chose one of her coursers, Linhardt opted to sit behind Caspar, and Bernadetta sat behind Petra on her thoroughbred. The rest were using Ferdinand’s three stallions.

Dorothea wished she could stay behind, she felt groggy and confused in her own heart, but she could not. The professor would not allow it, and Edelgard would think badly of it. It mattered that Edelgard would think that, apparently. Dorothea tried to will the heaviness off her stomach, she stared at the sky and all the clouds in it.

Four different battalions accompanied them, and Gilbert and his squires. Dorothea could hardly imagine the threat to be that big, Miklan had no crest, he had a relic he could not activate, and a band of cowardly bandits. For all the good that would do him.

The journey wasn’t a sight as dreary as she’d heard, but that was what she thought going through the open fields, passing by cities was a different matter. Enbarr truly was the biggest city in Fodlan.

Those cities and towns and even the capital was dwarfed by it, in luxury and in size. She didn’t have to live on the streets of the highborns to see how much more Adrestians cared about beauty. In comparison, the architecture of Faerghus spoke to them of dread. 

Her home, it cared about beauty.

* * *

When they reached the place Miklan had taken for himself, the tower was in ruins. Broken walls and strewn bricks and something suffocating in the air.

Dorothea brought no weapons but her dagger, she was armed with her magic and she felt it stir in her hands, eager to be used and tripping up the nervousness she tried so hard to suppress. They were all here with her.

“He’s here, Your Highness,” Gilbert said, and Edelgard frowned. She spoke of cruelty, of how the goddess was _cruel_. That Miklan was forsaken for a sin he was born into.

When Dorothea saw sympathy in Edelgard it cut her short, she was not unfeeling, after all, she really did loath the system that had wrought them this. The misfortune that got Dorothea thrown onto the streets was the same that drove the elder son of Gautier into madness. But what they shared in victimhood of crests they differed in state. She was a student with her life ahead of her, he was a deranged, exiled murderer.

She felt bad all the same. She felt bad for Sylvain, too. But that thought couldn’t reside in her long, they were entering the tower, and her head had to be with her. Not looking back to the confines of another place.

Once in they made quick work of the rogues they encountered, Edelgard, for all her anger, had been smug when their enemies fell by her blows. They witnessed her power, all right. It still made Dorothea’s heart jump seeing her in action.

But she worried too, about what the crests were doing to Edelgard, what if she felt weak with an attack from within? Could she help her here? Again like before? But that fear was put out of her mind the deeper they went into the tower. It had never happened in battle before, why would Edelgard falter now?

Byleth was at the front, leading them into the main hall of the tower where Miklan himself greeted them with a snarl and the promise of destruction. She used that sword of hers, the one that arched, snake-like, right into the eyes of her enemies. The one the goddess had given her.

How the goddess gave and took so selectively, Dorothea could not understand. But then she was grateful as it extended from her right through the heart of a man charging at her. Dorothea was too preoccupied with securing the backs of Petra and Ferdinand, that she was caught yet again by sudden. It wasn’t embarrassing to her, she was throwing Meteors and Thunders and taking out a good bunch, they worked like fingers on a hand, together.

The sword glowed, Miklan was surrounded. “Not bad for your kind.” The deranged voice said. He called them children, spoiled children and Edelgard twisted her axe into position. She looked like she planned to take him down with one blow.

It was in that moment that the sunlight got blocked, the lance in Miklan’s hand glowed, and the place felt on the verge of hell. Tendrils broke out of the Lance of Ruin and attached themselves to Miklan’s body. Dorothea and the rest looked in horror as he screamed his lungs to death, clawed his face, and bled onto the ground.

The body transformed into something truly horrendous, he was no longer a human. No sooner than they regained their footing did the beast attack. Edelgard was standing so close to it, and it tore away her shield with its mouth. Edelgard sunk her axe into the side of its head, but that did not stop it from lifting her. Dorothea had never conjured a spell that fast. In that moment her blast hit the beast with might and sent Edelgard crashing on the floor.

Immediately Hubert was upon her, shielding her with his body while Linhardt cast Heal for whatever broke in her body. The thing’s teeth had dented the plate on her arm and bloodied it. Dorothea looked away, and went back to throwing all she had at the Demonic Beast.

A moment later Edelgard got up and back beside her. The Black Eagles formed a barrier around it, but had to disperse every time it breathed fire at them. Bernadetta strung two arrows and managed to blind its eyes, that gave them the opening they needed.

She, Hubert and Linhardt cast at the same time, Edelgard severed half of its hand and Byleth went in for the kill. Plunging her sword right into its mutated heart. The screams were godless when they filled their ears again, and with that the beast vanished and left a limp, lifeless man in its wake. He was done, and Dorothea let herself cry again.

* * *

They spent the night at an abandoned house near the site of battle. Caspar had suggested staying at the tower itself, and Dorothea winced. Thankfully, others were of her opinion, too.

The building was big enough to accommodate them, and the students had tired of their tents. The reception was first turned into a medic theater. With what few healers they had running about for an hour or two and the others huddled to get warmed by the hearth. It was not too brutal, after all.

Later Dorothea found Edelgard, all their rooms were all on the same floor, she had her torn cape on her back and Edelgard’s face looked tired.

She looked dirty, too.

“There’s a bathtub in my room, if you’d like to use it,” Dorothea blurted. Edelgard’s room didn’t have one of its own, Dorothea had seen through the door when Edelgard stepped out. She thought Hubert would see to it that Edelgard got the best bedroom, and he probably did, but got waved off by Edelgard. She stood back at the tower, and then with the scouting troops. And went to rest later than all of them.

“Yes, that would be—“

“I could wait outside, it’s no problem,” Dorothea interrupted, why was she talking this fast?

“I won’t expel you from your room, Dorothea, I don’t mind using a screen.”

Dorothea felt heat in her face at the suggestion, but said nothing. She let her in, gave her one of her towels and a soap bar. And used the water buckets she requested be brought up to fill the tub. She poured and listened as the sound of the sloshing water filled the otherwise silent air. It’d been a long day, it had been a long month.

“I’ll be outside, if you need anything just call for me,” Dorothea had said. But before she could leave Edelgard grabbed her wrist.

“I’d like to discuss something with you,” she had already opened the buttons of her jacket but stopped there, letting her thin undershirt cover her small breasts.

Dorothea’s mind stopped, she felt suddenly like a kid in waiting of chastising. Edelgard’s tone was serious.

“First, I want to thank you for saving my life,” she started, formally, and Dorothea let out a small breath, she relaxed her shoulders. “And I want to apologize, for that night in your room.”

Dorothea looked at her slightly confused. “I chose that, Edie, you don’t have to apolo—“

“You acted without considering it, clearly you made the wrong choice.”

“Why would you say that?” Dorothea felt insulted, why was Edelgard trying her?

“You haven’t spoken to me since then, you avoid me, I’m certain you’re afraid of me, to a degree.” Edelgard wanted to look unaffected, Dorothea was sure, except there was a hurt present in the air. It bothered Edelgard, Dorothea knew it would, but tried not to think about it at all then. She was very—she was not exactly ready. But that was at first, then it was mostly just embarrassment and a lack of words. The longer it went on the less sure Dorothea was of what to do. What would she even say? Dorothea’s face flashed hot. “I just—I was being thoughtless, that’s all.”

“It’s been weeks.”

“You didn’t talk to me either,” Dorothea said, childishly.

It was clear that Edelgard was starting to get angry. It was visible in her composure for barely a second. “Because of your reaction!” Edelgard was both simmering and holding back, trying not to let it out of her at all. “Never mind, you can leave now.” She was ending the conversation and telling her to leave in a manner she thought to be detached. Dorothea wanted to stand her ground, but knew she warranted _some_ reaction. She didn’t know wether to apologize or get angry herself.

“Edie,” she said, and sighed and let the thing in her mind set free. “I can’t excuse it, I know, I didn’t react the way I thought I would. But it’s okay now, truly.”

Edelgard was quiet.

Dorothea finally allowed the weight of it to hit her, her voice grew weak. It was so unpleasant to be reprimanded, worse so when it was due to this. “I’m sorry you showed me yourself and I closed my door to you.”

“You don’t owe me that, I just thought you’d at least give me the decency of acting like it never happened.”

Her throat was constricting and it started to hurt so, so bad. Dorothea wanted to shrink herself. Even her feet didn’t let her move. She ached to say unsayable things.

“Edie, please..” Her voice was kitten-quiet. “Let me prove that that was a mistake.”

Edelgard’s voice was rough but just as low. She gave her her back and started to remove her ribbons “You don’t have to do anything.”

It was her queue to leave. But Dorothea couldn’t.

Dorothea thought quickly, she got into her space, crowded behind Edelgard til her body almost touched hers. She held Edelgard’s left forearm and gave it a gentle squeeze. Edelgard flinched. “You’re still hurt from today, let me take care you.”

She wanted this day to allow her to accept it again, her want to keep Edelgard close. Your personal trial is over, Thea! _Back to normal now!_ But she’d been telling herself this for weeks, and for weeks it failed her. Edie, Edie. Edie! Her mind was not used to silencing that name. Her mind was powerless against it. Edie. Edie. She missed _Edie_.

“Let me take care of you.” When Edelgard didn’t reply Dorothea gave her another, firmer squeeze.

She got her into the bathtub and started to work more healing magic into Edelgard’s arm. Dorothea sat there while Edelgard relaxed into the water. Watching tentatively, She kept at that for a little while. Feeling droplets of water pass through the gaps in the wood of the tub, and stain her shirt. Ah.

“That boy lost his brother,” Edelgard said suddenly, causing Dorothea to still.

“I ache and feel for him, despite never having lost a of sibling of my own, I’d imagine it to be horrendous,” Dorothea saw Edelgard turn the soap in her hand and then try to reach her back. It was a straining ordeal, with her other arm still recuperating, Dorothea tried to take the soap from her but Edelgard insisted she could do it. “I didn’t have any brothers.”

“I did,” Dorothea stared at the water and pursed her lips. It was no secret that there were more Princes and Princess at some point, but Dorothea had never heard her speak of them. “It’s intolerable, the first few days. ”

When it was clear Edelgard wasn’t going to elaborate. Dorothea said, “I only have my mother’s death to measure this by. Where does everything go wrong?” Edelgard gave her a look, that said: you know where it all goes wrong.

She’s heard this rant before. Edelgard talked of oaths against the foundations, against the nobility and most of all against their crests. While Dorothea had cheered her on, and got irrationally excited at the thought. It’s not that she doubted Edelgard, but hardly do changes like that occur, never do changes occur. The world is what it is, what’s dealt in it, and what rule it abides by, it doesn’t change and it doesn’t quit. Even if the robes are different the faces of their kings are new and dazzled.

Dorothea got up and left Edelgard behind the holed, wooden screen. “I have more vulneraries you could use, Edie. These have a special black claw root tincture. Taste good, too.”

Edelgard sloshed in the tub for a little while, and then: “Come bring them.”

When Dorothea relented before, when Edelgard was getting out of her clothes, Edelgard told her she had no qualms with the idea of her seeing her unclothed, if Dorothea was too proper she would stop and do it behind the screen. Dorothea wound up seeing Edelgard’s scarred shoulders and hairless pussy lips. _These scars_ , she asked Edelgard, _were because of your crest?_

More or less _,_ Edelgard had said.

There were scars on her stomach, too. And her arms, and the top of her thighs, where it connected to her hips. It was a hard sight, but Dorothea was not about to give an unwanted reaction. She would shut up and act nice. And not only that, she would accommodate well.

“Give me some,” Edelgard said. She was sitting up in the tub, from the sound of it. “Now, please.”

Dorothea brought them from her bag over to where Edelgard was. She saw her, sink back into the tub after having warmed it so much it made a few strands of steam. Edelgard hissed when the water touched her skin as she settled back into it, and Dorothea had to bite the inside of her mouth and think of the deeds of the past.

There was so much that had happened to both of them. To Edelgard even more than her. Who was going to pay this debt?

Dorothea decided not to bring the subject of Edelgard’s crest up at all. Instead she rested an elbow on the slippery rim of the tub while she unscrewed the cork of the vulnerary. She gave the opening of the bottle to Edelgard’s mouth, Edelgard drank it slowly, her lips wetting from the black liquid and her neck straining. Dorothea tilted the bottle higher to get the rest of the content into Edelgard’s throat, and she took it all. Grateful or maybe not, Dorothea could not presume too much. But Edelgard was looking at her at the end, when Dorothea held her neck to bring her closer to it and help her drink. It was too arousing to Dorothea seeing her like this; raw, needy, and helpless. But Edelgard was never helpless. It had aroused her too, when she saw her body, despite all its scarring it was magnificent. A sight to behold. But Dorothea did not stare too much, lest grew awkward. But then, even after Edelgard had her last gulp, Dorothea did not remove her hand from the back of Edelgard’s neck, and instead made her grip be soft and gentle, flipping her hand so the back of her fingers brushed up and down the length of Edelgard’s regal nape.

“They used this recipe in secret in the houses my mother used to work in, they wanted the sweet taste of the plant and its outstanding healing effects all to themselves. Thankfully even I know it. My mother gave it to me.”

Edelgard hummed, “Did she.” She was playing with the water, making small circles while keeping her half-lidded eyes in Dorothea’s direction. It was such a stark difference to how they were behaving just hours ago. From silence and avoidance to this. It tumbled from Dorothea’s mind onto the stone floor, the possibility of time. 

“Yes.” Both of their gazes were aimed down, like they couldn’t fully look at each other in that position. But their faces were not far away, and Dorothea’s hand on Edelgard’s neck.. It was a stirring in her heart. The warm air and the closed space and all the rawness of winning and of fighting. It got to Dorothea, and here, Edelgard von Hresvelg comfortable and pink in front of her. Skin beautiful, eyes beautiful and hair stuck to her face. Her eyes were looking at her when she spoke, “My mother held me close,” she leaned forward and cradled Edelgard’s head on her clothed breasts. “-when the nights were still.” It didn’t matter that she was wetting her uniform, it felt good to have the warmth of a human rest on her. Dorothea waited a few moments and then whispered that she wanted to be breached again like that, to be drank from, like that night in her room with Edelgard’s teeth if that’s what she wanted.

Edelgard shifted in her place, but she rested her head again on Dorothea’s breast, and closed her eyes.

“Take off your jacket, Dorothea,” Edelgard had said in her embrace, and to that Dorothea had rasped, “Yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your time and reading, enjoy!


	7. Burrow in

They moved to the bed to make things more comfortable for Dorothea. Her back had ached from kneeling over the tub for so long, and to ensure she did not faint or lose her footing. Dorothea sat and sloughed off her jacket, this, Edelgard said, was to avoid dirtying it with blood. Her other jacket had been drenched in blood and was put aside for washing, only that was a different kind of carnage, it was not her own blood that got into the seams. 

The sheets she sat on were brought from the monastery, and Dorothea had spares, it did not matter whatever happened on them, what they were about to do. 

After Edelgard dried herself she got into the only article of clothing that wasn’t dirty. She wore her shorts without underwear and was otherwise bare. Dorothea could still see her thighs and everything from her bellybutton up. She had imagined what her thighs looked like without those red tights many times in her room. Dorothea loved the sight as much as she thought she would, she wanted nothing more than to spread them apart, lick at the skin and situate herself there.

When Edelgard approached Dorothea, she did so carefully, waiting for Dorothea to back out or run, but Dorothea planned none of those things.

She locked the door when Edelgard first got naked, to avoid any of their classmates barging in, now she was glad for that; it would be even harder explaining this. Dorothea didn’t want any interruptions, either, she wanted to do this better than last time. This time she knew what to expect, and the heat that rose in her from arguing and making up had her incessant and eager. She would do it right, take Edelgard’s teeth and feel the heat of her body return while touching hers. 

She was glad that Edelgard didn’t cover up with the towel, Dorothea wanted to keep this moment of honesty between them going, but the other part of her was far too conscious of the fact that Edelgard was bare to her, skin and scars and all, it made everything more, more than it was.  Overwhelming. 

“Are you ready?” Edelgard asked, and Dorothea nodded. She watched as Edelgard sat on the edge of the bed next to her, felt the shift in the mattress under her weight. “You can lie down if you get tired.” 

Dorothea saw Edelgard lick her lips. She placed a hand behind Dorothea and one on Dorothea’s knee before leaning in, unhinging her jaw and showing the sharpness hidden inside. The pain was just as searing this time around, and Dorothea couldn’t keep holding her breath. She let it out with a low groan, and to that Edelgard responded with licks in between her bites. Dorothea’s skin was heating up, the press of Edelgard’s boobs to her forearm wasn’t helping.

Dorothea shifted back, and Edelgard followed, planting both hands on the mattress around her and leaning so she was half on top of her, but Dorothea was still supporting herself with her hands. She thought they’d give way soon, too.

In the haziness of it, Dorothea could feel how less reserved Edelgard was being with every suck. At first Edelgard had been polite and slow, like she was afraid she’d drain Dorothea, or maybe she was just taking her time, and this activity to her was also a pleasure, not just a necessity. Dorothea vaguely wondered about the necks Edelgard had touched and drank from before hers, as she reclined fully on the bed.

That made Edelgard throw a leg around her, she was atop of Dorothea now and so, so gone with her expression with her eyes closed. It wasn’t hard to get into a certain motion when both parties were attracted to each other. Dorothea knew there was no other reason for Edelgard to be raking her hand up and down her side, there was no need for this closeness this proximity this heat radiating off them both and the combined breaths that told her in whimpers: there was no going back. Victory here was a two-way street.

Edelgard switched to the right side of her neck, and the pain made something in her jolt, like an awakening of pride and lust. Edelgard was here, with her, needing her. Dorothea couldn’t help the heat pooling in her cunt; not with Edelgard’s wet lips entrapping her, Edelgard’s body entrapping her, Edelgard’s...her energy with which she did everything.

A moment later Dorothea grunted, and then screamed, Edelgard bit into a sensitive nerve that made her tremble. She shoved her off, making her shift on her knees to the side of the bed and in Edelgard’s apologetic face Dorothea saw half-lidded eyes and swollen lips and an arousal worth fighting for. 

They had flirted shamelessly before all of this started, just a month ago Edelgard had blushed and told her that yes, she’d be excited, and eager, should anything happen between them. Why shouldn’t it? 

It couldn’t have been a joke, Dorothea knew she commanded people’s attentions like that. And Dorothea knew Edelgard, she knows that she is needed, that Edelgard is compelled with a hunger towards her, she didn’t need to convince her, Dorothea was enjoying a worth that’s been handed to her on a silver platter.

With the way Edelgard was breathing now and the way she had touched her, there was hardly any comparison to anyone else. All those that streamed around her and asked her for dinners and nights spent panting in their beds were nowhere near Edelgard. 

The princess, here, was a force to be reckoned with. She took up too much space to even let Dorothea breathe. She’d fix that; by smothering herself completely, suffocating on the word Edie, _Edie_. It came out of her mouth as low as a moan could reach her throat. 

Edelgard’s breathing picked up when she realized what Dorothea was doing. She shoved her hand under her skirt and started moving immediately, Edelgard had stood off edge of the bed, giving Dorothea her space to recuperate, but that wasn’t what Dorothea was doing: she started masturbating, right there, hand moving underneath the fabric while the other grabbed at her neck, bearing her nails into the cuts Edelgard made, moaning filthily at Edelgard and waiting, waiting for her to do something. Edelgard obliged. 

She grabbed both of Dorothea’s hands and pinned them above her head, shifting Dorothea’s wrists so they were held under just one palm, while the other went at Dorothea’s clit, slowly, and then with a building speed and force. 

She pulled Dorothea’s skirt all the way down, and Dorothea wanted to shout with happiness, at how vigorous Edelgard was. The princess of Adrestia had her fingers rubbing on this commoner girl, bearing down on her and making Dorothea fill with power in her gut. Making her cry for much needed mercy. 

“You’re—“ her breath hitched. “You’re going fast—you’re, going to make me come, _Edie_ , Edie.” She whined, delirious and tender under Edelgard’s hand. 

Edelgard gripped harder on Dorothea’s wrists when she felt her lift her hips, it was going to hurt, and Dorothea was glad. Edelgard’s fingers gave her no reprieve, until she felt herself snap in half, her nub feeling raw and sore from Edelgard’s force. Edelgard was hypnotized by the tremors that went through her body, and watched tentatively as every spasm shook her until Dorothea felt reduced to nothing. 

When Edelgard’s breathing settled she pulled back, looking at Dorothea as if searching for a piece to pull out of her next, looking at her studying, wanting to make her unfurl again.

Edelgard kicked her shorts off, and settled herself directly on Dorothea’s pussy. She was stupid wet, it made Dorothea feel good. And when she started rocking into her, angling to the side to catch her clit on hers Dorothea had to stop herself from shouting. Her clit was still sensitive, and Edelgard wasn’t letting up. “You, you’re letting me.” Was all Edelgard would say, repeatedly. 

Being fiery and eighteen—no, she’s, she’s going to be nineteen, by midnight. She’s getting fucked into her new year and Dorothea thinks if she manages to latch onto someone like Edelgard by the age of nineteen then she’s far luckier than she had ever imagined. 

“It’s—“ Every word either of them spoke was intercut with loud moaning and harsh breaths, Dorothea was sure someone would have heard them by now. “It’s my birthday,” she managed at last. With everything going on at the monastery Dorothea forgot. 

Edelgard pulled back to look at her for a fraction of a second before plunging in to kiss her neck again. “What do you want for your birthday?” She asked, her fingers were in her, slipping in and out as she gave her open and sloppy kisses right where her fangs had marked Dorothea, trailing her tongue from the bottom of Dorothea’s neck all the way to her ear. 

“Apart from you, right now, I don’t know,” Dorothea giggled under the feeling of Edelgard’s tongue, and then let out a breathy sigh. “Give me anything and I’ll be happy.”

“You’re breathtaking.” Edelgard kept saying until the night swallowed her words. She left, eventually. Sometime after midnight and when the building was quiet as death. Edelgard’s cheeks were rosy with satiation, and Dorothea thought she could sing for the beauty of it all.

* * *

At the monastery things were going about their normal course, but everything had changed! Dorothea wanted to shout, instead she kept that to herself. 

She had told Petra, eventually, and the Brigid princess was gleeful and shocked, too. “Don’t go about telling, Petra, please. I don’t know if Edie would like that.”

“Oh, do not have worries. I will not be telling.” Petra beamed at her, giddy with the prospect of being told secrets. This was just one secret: Edelgard had fucked Dorothea. The other secrets were kept still.

They were sitting in the gardens, their classes were over for the day, so they took their leisurely activities to the outdoors. Naturally Edelgard and Hubert disappeared off somewhere, while the rest of them were either chatting or lounging.

“Hey! Hey, look at this, they’re fighting,” Caspar said, he was out of breath and excited.

Dorothea whipped her head in his direction. “Who’s fighting?”

“A crow and a cat! Ha.” Caspar was very giddy, at that moment there was nothing more amusing to him. 

Dorothea scrunched her nose, he couldn’t possibly think she’d want to watch that. Petra, was concerned for the crow. “Cats are powerful when they are preying on small animals, they will be shredding them.” 

Ignoring that, Dorothea went back to the jewelry she was adjusting. Her earrings had been dented, and she was using a small knife to straighten them out. Petra was playing around with some of the gemstones her grandfather sent her from Brigid, denting wires of weak copper around them. Dorothea eyed what she was doing but didn’t say a word, the edges of her lips turned upward. 

They just got back from the trip to Faerghus, no one could do much for her on a journey like that. But now that they’ve settled into ordinary life Dorothea was getting excited at the prospect of gifts. She liked that, the people here could buy what they pleased. 

The women at the opera house were a generous bunch, too. Giving her small tokens and dressing her in fine things. So were the filthy men that tried to earn her body with as little as a new dress.

Yet Dorothea couldn’t help the rush that came with holding something of value, taking it in your hands and calling it yours, it made her anxious at times. Even when she’d make sure that feeling never reached the tip of her tongue.

 _Hers_. Ownership was a funny thing. She’ll never get used to it, no matter how many things get thrown in her way.

“Dorothea, please, I want to be seeing your eyes,” Petra spoke to her, it made Dorothea let out a surprised laugh, the girl wasn’t even trying to be discreet, puzzling between the different shades of emerald spread in front of her.

Dorothea turned towards her. “Here.” She looked at her head on, with an intense gaze she reserved for dramatic rises in scripts or as a weapon of personal charm. She couldn’t hold it for long, though, both girls started giggling with ridiculousness. Wyvern Moon was gentle in its breeze.

Later Dorothea saw their teacher approach them, and snapped her attention to her when she announced that there will be a mock battle that month, and that this one will be far more ambitious than the one they had on Great Tree Moon.

“Where’s it going to be this time, not here?”

“It’s going to be in Bergliez, Caspar’s home,” Edelgard said. She was suddenly there, and the unexpected voice made Dorothea’s heart leap several times. Dorothea puffed her chest.

“The Battle of the Eagle and Lion,” Dorothea said, “That all sounds rather serious!” She laughed.

“We’re re-enacting history, with different outcomes, of course.”

“He ripped that crow’s wing off completely! Oh,” Caspar came in running, always out of breath. “Wait- what’s going on here?”

“We’re visiting Bergliez, Caspar, I hope you’ll be an accommodating host,” Edelgard said.

“Oh, yes, that,” he said, and then went about his graphic description of the animal’s misfortune again.

“I’m going to have lunch, Edie, care to join?” Dorothea said, getting up on her feet.

“I’m afraid I’ll be needing Edie in the library.” The girl named Monica joined them, she sounded very cheery, and Dorothea had to bite the inside of her cheek to stop herself from remarking. The girl was handsy too, hanging onto Edelgard like they were old friends. “Have loads of matters to catch up with at the academy, Edelgard here has been a great help.”

Dorothea felt the giddiness of the girl irritate her, but held that thought, she was just recently rescued, and had been missing for an entire year, she’d play nice. “Of course, have her all you want,” Dorothea smiled, and her nails bit into the softness of her palm. This was the third time she couldn’t spend time with Edelgard because Monica needed her. “I could help you, too. My magic’s top of the class.”

“That won’t be necessary, Dorothea,” Edelgard said.

The girl’s father was Count Ochi, and Edelgard’s curt reply made Dorothea think about the prospect of Edelgard convening on Imperial matters with Monica. Secrets, and all that. That didn’t make her feel better. 

It didn’t make her feel any better than the days she questioned herself on. She wasn’t going to do that. This was all very reasonable, after all. 

* * *

Dorothea went to Edelgard’s room. After what happened between them in Faerghus Dorothea felt she could come to Edelgard whenever she wanted, it didn’t matter if it felt warranted or not, her aversion had subsided completely, and Dorothea was agitating with possibility. 

She knocked, and the voice behind the door told her to come in. “Dorothea,” Edelgard said, like she was surprised it was her. She had papers and rolls strewn all over her desk, a candle was already lit. Edelgard wasted no time.

“You’re still studying?” Dorothea eyed the lines but could make out nothing from where she was standing, Edelgard was already stacking them up in neat piles, tidying up the space and storing away her quill. “No, just some work.” She got up and ran a hand through her white hair, flicking it behind her and adjusting the collar of uniform. Dorothea eyed her up and down, there was nothing new, her uniform was the same neat one she always wore, but Dorothea had a new appreciation for it now that she’d seen her take it off.

“Hello,” Edelgard said like a second greeting, she was standing close to her then, and smiling, getting into Dorothea’s space with her smug and content expression. Something in Dorothea’s body hummed, so they were going to be settling in a new thing after all. Dorothea started playing with Edelgard’s cuffs, and then, having to regain her power to flirt, got into what little space was left between them, and wrapped her hands around Edelgard’s waist. “I’ve been wanting to see you,” she said, and tried not to make it sound sad.

“Hm,” Edelgard started stroking her side. “And how have you been feeling? How’s your body?”

Dorothea wanted to laugh, but then figured that Edelgard was probably not talking about the effect their sex has had on her body. “Oh, I’m fine, great actually.”

“You’re not getting dizzy? Or lethargic? Let me see your neck.” Edelgard pushed her hair away from her skin, and then tentatively ran her fingers over where she’d sank herself into days ago. The feeling was so stark in contrast, and a shiver ran up Dorothea, settling in the base of her neck. “Eating well?”

“Yes, Edie.”

“And your heart?”

“What of it?”

Edelgard swiped her hand from her throat down to her chest, and pressed lightly. “Any irregular beats?”

Dorothea let out her breath. “Just a little.” Her voice was so low, Edelgard looked at her with concern.

“I wouldn’t want any harm to come to you from this, there wouldn’t be any point helping myself by harming someone else.” Edelgard seemed not to notice that Dorothea was looking at her lips, despite how close they were. But then again she busied herself with checking Dorothea’s skin for anything to indicate discoloration. “You haven’t had any cravings lately?”

“I have.”

“Like what?”

Dorothea resisted the urge to say, cheekily, her lips. Instead she recognized the weird feeling she had the night before for what it was, she wanted to put her wooden brush in her mouth, suddenly. “I—“ Dorothea grew red. “What would that have to do with this?”

“So you have felt a craving for non-edible things?” Dorothea nodded, and Edelgard pursed her lips. She looked serious. “Dorothea, if we are to keep doing this we’ll have to sparse out my feedings on you, looks like your blood levels haven’t recovered yet from before.” Edelgard thought some more, then, “I’ll make sure the cooks make beetroot soup for you. Drink more water and eat more, too.”

Dorothea wasn’t feeling as relaxed as she was when she got there, but she wanted the mood to steer back. “I’ll figure it out, Edie, Manuela could probably help. Now, I wanted to ask—“ 

The mention of Manuela’s name made Edelgard blink. “Manuela...uh. What do you want to ask?” 

The hesitation in Edelgard made Dorothea stop. “You haven’t told her?” Edelgard tilted her head a little to the side, and opened her mouth as if to explain, but stopped when Dorothea held her jaw and tilted her back to her, so their faces were inches apart. “Are you keeping me a secret, Edie?” She made her voice honeyed, Dorothea wanted to get to the next part. “I wanted to ask if you were free this evening, we can worry about all this later.” 

Edelgard finally got the implications, and her eyes flitted to the side quickly, like she was determining wether she was busy or not. That irritated Dorothea. “Fine, I’ll have Hubert get you something to replenish your circulation. And no, I have nothing scheduled for tonight.” Dorothea still held her chin in her hand, and when she stopped talking she placed her lips to hers. There was still a feeling to Edelgard that felt like restrain. Dorothea wanted to shake it out of her, she wanted loose, forceful, hungry Edelgard that took and took until Dorothea felt hollowed. But she did like this Edie, too. Well-mannered and thoughtful. Dorothea deepened the kiss, and once she got her tongue in Edelgard she got a moan out of her. Dorothea hadn’t intended to start right then, but Edelgard was quickly reacting, and started pushing her hips into her, then wedged her leg between Dorothea’s thighs. 

They stumbled to the bed. The nightstand had a lamp that flickered a shadow against Edelgard’s face. Edelgard had eased her down on the bed and laid on her. She stopped kissing her and they both sat there in silence looking at each other, in the dim light, and somehow in that moment Dorothea forgot about what’s between her legs and focused instead on Edelgard’s face. Dorothea sighed, this thing was telling her to pay attention, to take in everything, and her stomach started to knot. Edelgard was making Dorothea pained with how beautiful she was, with how it felt a little surreal, with how badly she was starting to need her. And Edelgard’s mouth opened in sympathy to Dorothea, swallowing her thoughts up in her mouth and smearing it on her tongue. It didn’t matter that she was unsure before, it didn’t matter what doubts and dreams of monsters she had seen, she felt well and content in a bed with Edelgard. And she knew that eventually, everything Edelgard is would be open to her, and she’d feel secure in a give and take between them. She trusts Edelgard, she trusts she’d be fair.

They writhed on the bed until they were both spent. Dorothea felt her hole well cared for and stretched, she had licked at Edelgard, and fucked her on her fingers until she came, and clenched her teeth to hold her voice. After Edelgard was lying on her stomach beside Dorothea, her ass was pink where Dorothea had grabbed and scratched at while holding her in place. “Ah.” Edelgard got on her elbow and reached for something from the nightstand. “This is for you,” she said and placed in Dorothea’s hand a hefty book. Dorothea looked at her, it took her a second to remember it had been her birthday a few days ago. “Edie, you didn’t! This looks gorgeous.” Dorothea ran her fingers on the golden cover, there were small carvings that made for patterns that reminded her of jewlery. It looked expensive, to say the least. A ruby was situated on the front cover inside of what looked like a golden eagle.

“This looks too much,” Dorothea said, growing weary at the thought of asking for a gift and getting so much in return. Usually she wouldn’t mind, but she didn’t want to feel burdensome to Edelgard. She didn’t want her to think she was digging for luxury.

“I’ve had this with me for some reason, and I hadn’t made use of it. I thought it would be better fitted with your handwriting in it, your lyrics and plays.” Dorothea flipped it open and was greeted with pristine paper. To write her plays, Dorothea smiled, so Edelgard wasn’t upset by that song she sung for her.

“But you can withhold talk about my glory and might until I’ve accomplished them.” Edelgard smiled, she was half teasing her.

“And when do you plan on accomplishing, princess Edie?” Dorothea was still admiring the handiwork of it.

“Soon, hopefully.” Dorothea had been joking, but felt Edelgard’s reply to be laced with seriousness. “You’re pretty determined about that, aren’t you?” Dorothea asked, and then, “Is that what you and Monica have been discussing? since her dad’s an important noble in Adres-“

“No. Here, write your name inside.” She got up to bring the quill, obviously trying to end the conversation.

“If you don’t want me to know that’s fine just-“

“Dorothea.” Edelgard like that was disconcerting, to say the least. Her tone threw Dorothea off. “There are things about me that you know, and more than that things you don’t. Please do not press me for answers I won’t give.”

“We’re—“ Dorothea wanted to say something about, about closeness. About a desire for more of it, about what already exists of it, but bit her tongue instead. “Where were we then? Give me the quill,” she said, extending her hand and extending her smile. She couldn’t do anything else, and she was in no mind to fight, about something she has no right fighting about in the first place.

Edelgard sat beside her while she scribbled a looped _Dorothea Arnault_ on the first page. Dorothea took the quill up to Edelgard and tapped her lips with the feather, Edelgard broke out a small smile.

Dorothea felt it, in small pecks in her heart, there was a world behind that smile that she was not allowed to consume fully. She’d consume in portions what was allowed to her.

The kiss was gentle, tapping on their hazed spent selves and making everything feel in place. Everything was in its right place for now. Edelgard’s lips were red, and the room was quiet and the bed was warm, Dorothea knew serenity only by name, she’d like to know it more.

“Why didn’t you tell Manuela? That I’ve been helping you with...” her voice trailed, she then ran her fingers over Edelgard’s lips.

“It’s not that I planned not to,” Dorothea marveled at the sight: Edelgard unsure. Hesitant “Nor that I won’t, in fact, it’d be far better that she knows I’ve been...supplementing.” Edelgard laughed a small thing, surprised by how humorous that was. “I would have, but after you receded I—I didn’t feel the urge to divulge my embarrassment.” Edelgard looked up at Dorothea, fearful of how her vulnerability would land, it seemed. Guilt was threatening Dorothea again, falling from the top of her head and the tips of her hair. She fancied herself to be gentle, she was going to show Edelgard all of that.

“Here.” Dorothea scooped her into her embrace, resting her on her chest and stroking her hair. “I’m sorry.”

“She would be critical, too, I think.” Was Edelgard afraid Manuela would not approve?

“I’m the one who’s asking you to do this now, she couldn’t possibly object to that,” Dorothea said, the conversation they had replayed in her mind, there was a danger it could pose to Dorothea’s body. 

“I have been using her medicine for a while now, while helping myself to animal blood. She’d be peeved to know I’m doing it on you.” Dorothea saw an opening right then, and decided she’d dip her fingers and spread more of it. “How long has this, all this been going on?” 

Edelgard took a moment to think, wether about the answer or if she should answer at all, Dorothea wasn’t sure. Then Edelgard got on her elbow, her brows knotted, it gave her an adorable complexion, something Dorothea would usually tease her about. 

Finally, Edelgard said: “Six years.” 

Dorothea’s heart clenched, Edelgard sounded sorrowful. 

They were still naked, Dorothea had pulled Edelgard’s gold-embroidered blanket on them to trap the heat. Autumn was here, and the nights were getting chilly. Still, Edelgard’s body was warm like the rising sun, Dorothea snuggled her close. The notebook was next to them on the bed, Edelgard’s gift to her. She’d gift something back to Edelgard, in the form of words and songs and more. 

“Manuela taught me how to write well, she’ll turn out as a bigger influence on you than you think!” Dorothea said and nudged Edelgard’s side. “You said to write about your deeds and sing of you after you’ve accomplished them. I know how noble you are, Edie, I know you’ll make that promise worth while. And I’ll be there, to make everyone else see it too.”

* * *

  
Their march to Gronder Field was a lively one, with Ferdinand and Caspar and Hubert, too, boasting about the abundance of Bergliez. The farmlands here feed and supply the capital and the far reaches of the empire, they told her. 

“My father talks a great deal about Count Bergliez’s managerial and logistical prowess,” Ferdinand said, the morning sun getting into his marigold hair. Dorothea liked that, but would not say so out loud. “All types of grains, plentiful and of the highest quality!”

Hubert had replied that his father talked a great deal, generally. Ferdinand was somehow un-offended.

They passed by open fields with peasants still out in them, their oxen pulling on the carts and ploughing blades. Dorothea was busy looking at a kid running with his father when Petra trailed close to her with her courser. “I’ve been living in Adrestia many years, I have not been seeing this beautiful place yet.” She pointed at the heaps of dirt stacked in lines across an acre. “They finished the harvesting?”

“They’re readying the ground for winter’s grain,” Hubert said, he was not scowling or looming for once, it made Dorothea smile to see him happy with the countryside. “Wheat and barley. They’ve already finished the harvest, the crops gained will be distributed or preserved. The Count has many a silo and granary across Adrestia.”

“Yes, he does,” Edelgard said, she was keeping a pace faster than theirs to keep up with their teacher, but every once in a while would slow down a little.

The talk of Casper’s father made Petra’s face go dark. Her curious, open expression from moments ago vanished, like she had just now remembered who’s home they were in.

The crown prince of Brigid was on her mind, Dorothea knew, it would be hard not to think about your dead father while riding through his slayer’s land. Dorothea thought about her father often, if only he were slain too, Dorothea thought darkly, at least she could remember him fondly.

Edelgard was beside her and Petra while they crossed Myrddin bridge, keeping up with their pace. Edelgard held onto the reigns and came closer to the princess, giving her a sure nod, Petra nodded back.

They must have talked about this. Edelgard did not mention it, she must have thought it to be another one of her grand secrets. Marvelous.

When they stopped to rest Edelgard led her to the shade of a Beechtree. She picked nuts off the ground and removed their thorns, handing some over to Dorothea and eating the rest. Edelgard was cracking her fifth Beechnut for Dorothea. “How will Petra fair, in the battle, I mean?”

Edelgard immediately knew what she meant. “Petra is a strong girl, I’ve been with her long enough to know that. She will not let emotion get in the way of survival, or in this instance, of victory.” Edelgard was talking nonchalantly, or that was the front she was putting up, at least. It infuriated and aroused Dorothea all at once.

“You can’t expect her to just...” she trailed, Edelgard handed her another opened nut, but Dorothea waved it off. “You think emotion is the antithesis of logic, don’t you?” Dorothea was in the mood to challenge. Anything, anything to get Edelgard to open in her palm like the nuts in her hand. “She’s smart, yes, she’s also hurt by Caspar’s father, wounded irreversibly.” Dorothea never saw any open hostility between the two, in fact Petra seemed pretty malleable for a person in her situation, like she couldn’t not be good with Caspar, but she couldn’t fully let him in either. Dorothea had seen this confusion in Petra before.

“If acting on emotion brings the entire group down then yes, it is anti-logic. And no, no one can be beholden to their father’s sins. Goodness knows how many people would be dead now if that were the case.” Something terrible flashed in Edelgard’s eyes, a fire that told: fear me, I am angry in ways you can not imagine.

“Edie, do you—what do you think about forgiveness?”

Edelgard gave it a moment’s thought before answering, the wind swayed her hair so it came in her eyes, she pulled the strands behind her ear before Dorothea could. “Only if necessary, maybe temporarily. Never for the unrepentant.”

“Why do you hold such grand standards for everything?” Dorothea said, half breath, half amusement. “Such preposterous ideas, you’ll make them work, won’t you? You’ll make this country a better place?”

“I’ll make sure of it.” Edelgard swiped the back of her gloves. “And much more.”

* * *

At Gronder the weather took a turn. The clouds were blocking out most of the sun and a chill started knocking on their bones. Dorothea was not put off by the low-stakes of a friendly battle, but there was some unease in her. 

Dimitri, and his House to their left, Claude and his to their right. Manuela had opted to not join, still not back to her full strength, and Hanneman did too out of respect to her. Dorothea was glad that Manuela had a person like that as her friend, Goddess knows she deserved it.

Each House’s Standard was flapping in the wind. Theirs was the Black Eagle on the red field, double headed, looking upon its left and its right and flying, something to do with reaching what can’t be reached. Dorothea, despite her resentment to many of its constituents, couldn’t stop the feeling of belonging gorging in her at the the sight. Adrestia, beautiful, hideous Adrestia. But the belonging came from here, the people beside her. They’ll be the new faces, she knew, they’ll lead her into a better future. They promised.

The sight of the Deer was fine to her, but somehow the Lion made her uneasy, it felt much more aggressive. She liked Ingrid, and Mercedes, and Dedue, and didn’t hate the rest, but she had a feeling that they would be their strongest adversary. The cat eats the bird.

“Dorothea.” She heard Edelgard call for her, and understood that to be an order. The professor managed their formation, Edelgard told Dorothea to situate herself next to her. There was no real danger.

“Do you think we’ll win, Edie?”

Hubert was adorning Edelgard with the last of her armor, she extended her arm to attach the shield. Edelgard had, for the first time, worn a helmet. “I can’t see why not,” she said, “Anything set on your path can be done. The Blayddid king defeated my ancestor, they called him Rodrick the Wretched. They split off his empire and made their own rules. They set out with a purpose, and came through with it. This day reminds us of that.”

“How strange of you, Edelgard, you’d think such a story would make you scorn, not applaud.” She laughed, Dorothea was aware of the story, Loog the King of Lions and his scions, how they split up the continent, open like a tender heart. “You think they were right?”

Edelgard lowered her visor. “I think change is part of life.” They were all in position, Bernadetta flanking the back, Edelgard, her and Byleth charging head first, and the rest securing the sides of their formation. Before the trumpets sounded Dorothea looked to Edelgard, her eyes were concealed behind the metal of the helmet. Steel colored, with a two headed eagle situated on the head, its eyes made of sapphire. But she felt Edelgard’s eyes on her, somehow. Then, gathering a nervousness from the air said, “Careful, Edie, the feline eats the bird.” She didn’t know where the doubt had sprouted from, but the shift was in her heart. Suddenly, Dorothea was afraid Edelgard would fall, pass-out, be too brazen. She hadn’t fed on her since Faerghus, Edelgard didn’t agree, and now the armor up on Edelgard somehow made Dorothea less secure, like Edelgard was too far away from her. She wanted her nearer, armor-less just be near her. There would be no fatalities in this battle, she wanted Edelgard, however, to be without barriers.

“The feline is a Rusty-spotted cat, and this bird is the black, two-headed predator.” Edelgard said, and gripped her axe. Dorothea was being silly, she knew she was, but her heart was a wretched thing. It wanted all this to be over, she just wanted to strip Edelgard of all of this, and lie down inside her. The courage in Edelgard’s voice soothed her to an extent. Still, she wanted to split her open from her body and climb in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ehh wow, this is the longest chapter ive ever written! There are parts that i feel came out,,, not as I imagined them, or maybe thats just the 4 am sleep-deprived critic in me. Anyway, hope u enjoy, let me know what you think!


	8. Treaded

Dorothea poured over the old books in the library, skimming them for enchantments and concoctions. A book fell from her arms and landed on its spine, Dorothea checked the damage and put it back where it was, hoping no one saw. It got cracked, the pages’ binding separated from the spine. It must have been very old, Dorothea hadn’t the mind to look through it anyway. When the final candle had burned out she was not there to witness it, she found what she was looking for before that, and headed off.

The creeping feeling in her gut had grown less and less familiar as time passed, and the time she spent with Edelgard was to her liking. Perfectly balanced, she applauded herself, even when the professor had assigned them to weed together, and then to tend to the horses and the wyverns.

“You two like to hang around each other. I’m told affinity makes for better work. Rhea said so.” Dorothea was not sure what emotion was going through Byleth when she said this, other than nonchalant observation. Still, it made Dorothea feel a tinge of pride to be grouped like that with their house leader.

The caution of new things was rapping at her door. _You couldn’t possibly lean on this, have it elevate you and your name for long._ But for now it would do. They didn’t have to know everything, no matter how itching Dorothea was for that, but they had to know she was her friend, her close friend at that. That must come with some perks, mustn’t it?

First things first, Dorothea had to stop herself from getting carried away with possibility, and focus instead on how to best keep Edelgard interested in her outside of bed.

She could try and talk strategy, perhaps. Better yet, Edelgard liked achievement, she should try perfecting her magic as much as she could. The perfect woman wants perfect people, after all. That was what Edelgard had shown time and time again, Edelgard liked results, and respected willpower. Competent was the word that flashed in her mind over and over again. Fine, if that’s what it takes.

It wasn’t going to be too hard. Don’t push too far, don’t let her go more than a day without seeing her—most things could break from inattention, striking a balance was something Dorothea had learned and learned well.

At the opera she had to maintain the right amount of presence when it came to crowds and production directors and people of interest, and she had seen up close what pathetic desperation looked like. She mustn’t show Edelgard just how bad she wants it—her, but rather showcase herself, parade around, while allowing herself her moments of warm want and playfulness.

Too much attention led to resentment, Dorothea knew. But she was struggling, still, with containing her sentiments. 

* * *

She was at the greenhouse, asking the gardener for ant tree bark, and was planning to head down to the kitchen when she heard a commotion by the lake. Dorothea followed the noise.

“This is _horrible_ ,” Bernadetta looked on the verge of tears, repetitive as that was, but Dorothea inquired nonetheless. “Remire Village is run over with a plague, the people have turned into monsters. We have been assigned to stop this, and subdue them within our means,” the professor said, and then turned from her to Edelgard. “That’s where we first met.”

“Yes, my teacher. We must think of how to minimize the loss of life as much as possible.”

“You mean that they’re no longer humans? Is there a way to turn them back?” Dorothea asked, “Make them normal again?”

“Some things can’t be undone, I’m afraid,” Edelgard said, “Though I hope I’m wrong.”

Dorothea saw them talk of strategy and formation, of how to best enter through the village and which weapons and spells would protect them best without causing too much damage.

“Lin, what do you know about this, human to demon transformation? I could bring you a specimen so you and Hanneman could have a look.” Edelgard was steering the dialogue now, looking determined as ever. Dorothea could not help the sensation under her hands that wanted nothing more than to touch her.

“Well, they seem to be crestless, so that can’t be their trigger. Although, from what I’ve studied from the Miklan incident, it could be relic-related.” Linhardt was for once, attentive.

Dorothea didn’t dislike this. The way they all worked together, like that’s how it’s always been, like they belong to the same unit, truly. Dorothea had to focus on the floor for a bit, willing the stupid need of belonging out of her body. She wanted to think of something to say, she wanted to add to them.

When Edelgard returned to her room Dorothea was already there. She was sitting in her armchair, the one by her desk, without a single article of clothing on, and with a dildo strapped to her groin.

Edelgard paused at the door. Dorothea saw the change that went through her, from surprise to flustered understanding to complete control again. She realized, with Edelgard’s back turned to her and her voice low in conversation, that she was shielding Dorothea from being seen, and dismissing the person with her. Dorothea recognized Monica’s voice. When Edelgard closed the door she stood with her hands behind her, leaning back on it, raking her eyes up and down Dorothea while somehow maintaining composure.

“I hope I didn’t ruin any plans,” Dorothea said coyly. Edelgard pursed her lips.

“No, you don’t hope that,” she said. Dorothea knew putting Edelgard in such a position would spurn her into action and hoped it would successfully arouse her to be hers for the night. But she hadn’t anticipated that someone would come back with Edelgard to her room. Dorothea was pushing aside one feeling to deal with the other. Right now, she wanted to put on her best show.

“Edie,” she said, arousal overtaking her voice, making it work for her. “I want you to come take a seat.” Making it—not sweet, but something else, something hard to deny. Mouth open and wet, she ran her hands over the smooth skin of her thighs, and saw as Edelgard’s eyes followed the path, from the inside of her thighs, to the top, to the toy positioned above her cunt.

She pumped it in her fist, the oil she drizzled on it helping her in her smooth motions. She didn’t break her gaze from Edelgard for one moment. Imagining Edelgard’s parted folds sliding up and down it, wetting the cock as it went in and out of her. Dorothea could come from rubbing her clit to that thought alone.

Edelgard was watching her efforts, the way her fingers curled around the cock, and said nothing. Instead, she strode across the room, unclasped her cape from her uniform, and held it up in front of Dorothea. “Since you’ve lost your clothes,” she said, dropping the cape onto her desk. The fabric landed neatly, looking lush on the sleek wood. “You should wear this when you’re here.” Dorothea felt her stomach stir. Her throat got dry, suddenly needing a taste of Edelgard’s spit in it to make it soft. She just received an order, and _goddess_ was Edelgard hard to deny.

“Just the cape?” Dorothea asked, her excitement hard to contain. She resumed her pumping.

Edelgard’s reply was a smug raising of her brow. Dorothea was already desperate. It had been a straining day, and she intended to spear it in half by spending time with Edelgard. Make it much more palatable, and to have Edelgard play with her at this, it was working. Dorothea wanted to taunt Edelgard, rile her into action. She bit her lip. “Come on, Edie. It’s a nice seat. Come on, I want to fill up that sweet cun-“ She was silenced when Edelgard pushed down her shorts and tights and underwear in one motion. They were half-way down her legs, she kicked her shorts to the floor, wasting no time in straddling Dorothea’s lap, bunching the fabrics to the side and taking Dorothea’s toy to her entrance.

She held herself there, with the tip teasing her folds. “My sweet cunt?” she asked, playing back at her in her game. Dorothea turned to mush every time Edelgard loosened a little and utilized her charm. It was intoxicating having her tease, this Edelgard was exclusive to her, no one else got to see how charming Edelgard was, how forceful. No one else could see how wet Edelgard could make Dorothea. She tried to rein it in, but could not. Edelgard’s eyes were colored a darker shade of lilac in the candlelight, and Dorothea saw in them the determination of getting fucked.

“Now, come on, Edie.” Dorothea was going to start whining, if she had to.

“What do you want, Dorothea, let me hear it.”

“Edie, I swear I’ll grab your thighs and start bouncing you myself,” she said, as the thought turned from a comment to churn Edelgard on to a very, very appealing option.

“Okay. Okay, Dorothea. I see you’re impatient,” Edelgard said, but kept still. Then she started moving the head on her outer folds, bringing it up and down her slit, trailing it til Dorothea felt her pulse in her face. She was drawing this out while all Dorothea wanted was to hear that high-pitched voice of hers that Edelgard produced only behind closed doors. But the teasing brought her a different kind of satisfaction. She was worth the wait.

“Edie, fuck.” Dorothea bucked up into her, causing Edelgard to pause and close her eyes. Maybe she’d had enough herself. Dorothea aligned the cock to Edelgard’s hole and bucked again, only so the tip was past her tight flesh. Edelgard, finally defeated, sat down, taking the length in inch by inch, until her hips settled on Dorothea’s. She closed her eyes then and rested her forehead on Dorothea, while Dorothea started patting her head. Then, with little warning, wrapped her arms around Edelgard’s behind, and lifted her. She dropped her down gracelessly, Dorothea was not used to carrying anything heavier than a wooden chair, but it was a small enough distance. Edelgard let out a gasp, and then another when Dorothea lifted her again and dropped her. The toy was shining with Edelgard’s juices and Dorothea felt the strong urge to take it in her mouth.

Instead she focused on her speed, dropping Edelgard and thrusting up in her at an increasing speed. Edelgard’s breasts followed her motion and Dorothea’s head leaned on them in order to get a tighter grip on Edelgard.

“You’re- you’re awfully vigorous today,” Edelgard said between her gasps. Her forehead was starting to bead with sweat, Dorothea’s too, she was sure. The heat between them was growing. Good, Dorothea thought, let them be sticky and disgusting when all this was done, so she’d say she fucked Edelgard raw and be pleased with herself while she washed off.

“I’m happy and wanted to treat you.” Even Dorothea’s own breathing was harsh, despite her pussy not being the one pounded into. Dorothea tired of the position, despite how heavenly the noises and view were, she pushed Edelgard off onto her feet, got up, and before Edelgard could protest, shoved her onto her ass where she was sitting instead. The chair was not very wide, but it accommodated well. Dorothea grabbed Edelgard’s calfs, rested them on her shoulders, then pushed her way into her again. Her hands came to rest on either of Edelgard’s thighs. It was an awkward position for her, and her legs were sure to cramp, but Dorothea felt intoxicated on it. On grinding into Edelgard like that and hearing her name in low, wrought-out moans.

Again, they changed places, this time on the bed. Dorothea sat with her legs bent beneath her and made Edelgard sit on her lap. She had her turn around so her back was touching Dorothea’s stomach, and from there Dorothea started with a gentle pace, relishing the feel of Edelgard cuddled up in her arms while getting fucked. “Dorothea,” Edelgard said, as encouragement, and put her hand atop Dorothea’s, while her other reached for her clit. Dorothea’s arms were trapping her in the embrace, and Edelgard started rubbing on her hand. Then she let out a noise, louder than usual, that drove Dorothea more. She sped up and put more weight behind her thrust, settling into a bruising pace, was rewarded as she watched Edelgard still, with a noise caught in her throat and a sweet spasm ripping through her.

Edelgard grew limp on top of her, but Dorothea held her tight. She let her back fall down on the mattress and took Edelgard down with her. They stayed there quietly, with only their breathing communicating between them. Like the gasps and deep breaths told them of satisfaction, of peace. Dorothea had removed the harness and rubbed herself. It didn’t take much, she had already been at her edge. 

“You’re amazing.” Was all Edelgard said to break the silence, which didn’t feel the need to be filled anyway. The air smelt of contentment.

A while later Dorothea brought up Remire.

“You asked Lin to examine them for you,” Dorothea said. She took a second gulp from the bottle she brought. “His birthday’s coming up. We could get him something nice and sit him down for a talk. I was thinking, maybe he could help, too. With your...”

She wondered why it was hard to bring up outright and to talk clearly, but then she remembered that Edelgard hardly spoke it out loud to begin with.

“He theoretically could find a solution, or a cure. But right now I have no time to be tested on or exposed.”

“I’m sure school work could be managed, Edie. What could possibly be more important than your health?”

Edelgard went quiet, then gestured at the bottle in Dorothea’s hand. “You’re drinking without offering me a cup?”

“It’s not wine, I-,” Dorothea frowned. “Why won’t you do it?”

“Dorothea, I said before. Don’t ask me about things-“

“Things you won’t answer, of course. How could I forget?” Dorothea’s bitterness was obvious. Or maybe it was disappointment. She thought it must be both. These things were always intwined.“Listen, I’m not asking for much. I’m worried for you.”

“You’ve helped me more than enough, Dorothea, you shouldn’t worry. You’ve done an extraordinary job taking care of me.” Edelgard somehow caught her unarmed.

“Of course I would, Edie.” How easy it was to steer her with a few nice words, but Dorothea was overwhelmed with a fluttering in her gut at praise from her. “I want to see you healthy and happy.”

The kiss caught Dorothea by surprise. It felt calm on Edelgard’s part, none of the frantic passion from just a while ago, but it burned through Dorothea like a gift of flames. “Thank you.”

Edelgard shut the conversation down. Her eyes were so beautiful and her lips were so warm that Dorothea felt nothing was in her control at all. Edelgard broke the kiss.

“You’re right, it’s definitely not wine,” Edelgard said, tongue swiping her lower lip.

* * *

They reached Remire at dawn.

The fog was everywhere, capturing them in a suspended world. Outside of here people were well and good; inside the village there were monsters and darkness. Edelgard had been adamant against calling them that. “This is vile, whoever did this must pay,” she said. Dorothea could swear she saw certainty like no other in her eyes.

The children were tearing at each other’s flesh as they transformed and took up a will that wasn’t their own, scraping and screeching. It turned Dorothea’s stomach inside out. She thought the worst things that could happen to a child had already happened to her, she was wrong.

If it came to it, she would use her spells to end their lives, Dorothea hoped the plan the professor had devised to capture them would succeed. Surely this doesn’t have to go to the edge of life and make her strip others of it. But the scene was already horrific. Dorothea instantly looked for Edelgard, needing her firm grasp on hers. It was not the first time she’s had to draw someone’s life out of their body.

“Edie,” she called out again. Edelgard seemed not to hear her the first time, and still now, too preoccupied with their leader. They would not wait more, but instead charge headfirst. _The cold is getting into my bones_ , she thought, that it would begin now, as they entered the mist. 

Inside, she and Hubert lit fires to aid their vision. It was not easy facing an enemy you could not see. Not easy when she can’t see their face. It was morbid to think that she’d strike someone while looking right at their malformed features. But how could she anticipate their moves otherwise? She had to know their intentions.

No, she had to look death right in the eye. She heard Edelgard command, “More fire.”

“Edie, tell me where you are. I can’t see you,” Dorothea said, I can’t see you. A stabbing pain bloomed from her side, and she realized it was a wound a second too late. She let out a pained grunt. Her opponent was small but deft, and Dorothea had to use her weaker spells to combat him in this close a space. When he fell she stared around her, looking.

Dorothea found herself separated from the others at that point. She thought she had her entire radius secured, thought, despite her loneliness, that she was fine. But then the place she was at was surrounded, demonic beasts with claws that ached for her neck. The scales on the back of one of them seemed to expand as it got closer to her. The screams in her throat received no permission to leave, her tongue only moved with enchantments. Too late. The beast that took the hit fell back just a little, while the rest were onto her. Again, her scream would not come out, despite that it burned her. Nothing but the cries of demons filled the place. A claw lunged at her, throwing her several feet back. Her back hit the ground with an audible crack.

It didn’t take long for her surroundings to darken, for her brain to tap out. Her _body_ was tapping out. All she could think was that she couldn’t move. If she was going to die, what use was anything she’d done?

Dorothea knew her back was broken when her arms refused to move. The pain was blinding in its own right. It shot from every nerve inside her, drowned out all logic in her mind. But the inability to move meant she couldn’t even heal herself, and if that were the case...

Dorothea started to cry. The foundational part of death was tears, the way her mother had wept as she clung to her last breaths had been horrifying. The dark bleeding shame dripping off her, the stench of hopelessness. The way all she was crumbled bit by decaying bit. Dorothea took the pained breath in as deep as she could, and screamed her lungs out. She was not going to cry herself to death without at least trying. _Let someone hear me,_ was the thought, _anyone, it doesn’t have to be Edie, anyone. Let them hear me. Please._

It was as close to a prayer as she’d gotten to in a decade. She tried grasping for a vulenrary, but nothing in her moved except her mouth and eyes. Such beautiful eyes, her mother used to coo, someone would surely be swayed by them enough to want to save us.

 _Look at where I am_. She wanted to shout at the ghost and the memory. _Look at the lengths I’ve gone to save myself._

And what good it did her, fighting for someone else, when all she should have done was laid back and accepted her fate. She should have been less greedy. No, no. This mess was happening because she was not selfish enough.

She was surprised that the thought didn’t stop her earlier. She was angry with herself, angry with Edelgard for leaving her alone, angry with her forsaken mother for leaving her in the first place. Angry with the whole world for everything it’s done. When has she not been alone? She has always been alone. She would always be alone. She thought of all that, yet Dorothea was not going to waste a breath thinking about her father, not when it seemed to be her last.

Her eyes. Right in front of her eyes were those of a beast, on top of her, snarling and breathing into her face when none of this should have happened at all. She started sobbing, a pathetic, spit-filled thing. She could hardly see anymore, tears drowning her out. _For the better, for the better not to see._

“Here!” she heard the voice of a man shout. Then the beast on her was getting pulled off with black magic. Purple filled her vision. The next moment its head burst from its body, coating Dorothea in a spray of fluid and tissue. “We have a critical injury. Linhardt!” For all her time knowing Hubert, she had never heard him so—animated. So angry.

He kneeled down, uncorked a vulnerary and brashly shoved it in her mouth, his eyes were focused and frightening. He tried his hand at a healing spell, but what she needed was something more drastic.

“Get up,” he said.

“I can’t,” she spoke when her mouth was empty.

“Fine. _Linhardt_ ,” he shouted again. He cleared through the other three beasts before he got to her. Still, he stood on guard lest another appeared. “Where is she?” Dorothea asked in such a weak voice.

“I’m not drawing her here when that could cause her peril and danger. All seeing you like this would achieve is weaken Lady Edelgard. Keep your wits about you, help is on the way” She let out a defeated noise. Of course he would. His devotion to Edelgard blinded him to how obviously _she_ needed her. Dorothea grunted and let her eyes drift close. The hysterics she was in lessened now that no monsters were tearing at her, but her paralysis and the deep pain that accompanied it still left her delirious. _You will not die here._ She wondered what amount of laudanum would be enough to calm her after this. 

“Hubert-“ she grunted, “Your- your concern for her is admirable, but it’d be better if we were all- all together again. Stick together.”

He looked unaffected. “Help is coming. Do not think with selfish impulse.”

Dorothea knew there was no getting to him. He had told her before, that he’d reject an order from Edelgard outright if it caused her more harm than good. She laughed then, finding this defiance hard to imagine, not when he looked like he was one step shy of worshipping Edelgard. Dorothea knew of romance, she knew the feeling when it came, and that feeling was not one that could be denied and refused. If she had loved Edie like Hubie did, why, she wouldn’t be able to utter a single no.

This was not usual for Dorothea, it was others who scrambled at her whims and wants, short-lived as that was. It was supposed to be the other way around. She made others feel powerless to refuse her. But then all that had been on her mind recently were fantasies of fulfilling Edelgard, in all ways possible.

Now, however, on the blood matted mud of Remire, back and spirits broken, Dorothea could think of nothing worse than servicing another. It was their desire to help others that got her here, it was the orders of Rhea and Byleth that wound her where she was.

She strained to move again, but couldn’t. Hubert wouldn’t mind, she knew, he wouldn’t mind dying for a mission and a path, an ideal, but she did. She minded. It was nothing she wanted for herself, martyrdom. How hideous.

But the thought was poisonous, Dorothea focused on her breathing. _Helping another was no mistake, it was no mistake._

When Linhardt arrived Hubert immediately left. He patched her up enough to let her move again. The more extensive work had to be done at the monastery, he said. It was a good thing her neck didn’t snap, and kill her. Linhardt clicked his tongue.

Later she managed to witness the revelation for herself, when Dorothea could walk again, though she had no mind to continue fighting, there was no running away now. Tomas, their age-withered professor transformed and morphed right in front of their eyes. The wretched man had been deceiving them for so long, and the treachery only served to dampen their spirits even more, if there were hidden traitors in plain sight, who could they trust?

The battle was over then, the Death Knight and Toma—Solon, and some other freak too, had fled. Dorothea could feel the reverb of every breath in her spine, the way time felt a little slower, now that each movement gave her pain. She looked for Edelgard still, for what, she did not know. At that point, Dorothea felt muddied with the delay. She had wanted to see that girl for too long now, it almost felt stupid. _She should have come looking for me. She should have stopped them_. For all the help Hubert had been, Dorothea felt a sense of loss. _It should have been her._

Still, Edelgard was nowhere to be found. “Those cowards must be in the business of pissing on grass, why, every time we have them they run away.” The orange haired girl from the Alliance had joined them on the mission, on Byleth’s request. The two mercenaries had fighting styles that matched and a brashness that suited them both, despite the seemingly petty attempts at besting each other that they had. She spat on the ground, as if to overstate her disgust. Brash. But she and the professor seemed to be on the same page. “They’re running away, yes. That means they are cowards,” Byleth said, “But it is also a strategy, they must be waiting for the right reinforcement before taking us head on. Another ally, perhaps.”

“They have no ally in me, when they commit atrocities like this.” The foreign voice bloomed in the empty battlefield. There was hardly anyone standing in the ruins, but the professor and her father, Dorothea, and—Leonie’s her name. She remembered that, Byleth talked about her. She used her as an example in her classes, have you seen how much Leoine power puts behind her swings? She would boast.

Immediately, they drew weapons. The clouds did not part, despite the dissipating of the fog. Dorothea could see the figure of the stranger, cape and armor and mask. The shining in place of his eyes pierced right through her. _So_ _this is the Flame Emperor._

Byleth was ready in her stance, sword drawn and anger stated clearly on her face. “No ally in you? We’re not so easily fooled,” she said.

“You are mistaken, I may have worked with them, but none of this was my doing, none of this would have gone through had I known.” The Flame Emperor held nothing in his hands, no steel or weapon. Was he that reckless? Or was he that sure, that he would not need it?

Dorothea flexed her fingers. She could conjure something quick and precise enough that Byleth wouldn’t have to waste her sweat. And yet Dorothea wasn’t too confident, the mishap from earlier flashing cold and clear in her heart. _I should have been singing and twirling on a stage right now, I should be drowned in roses and bouquets, not guts and blood._

“Again, we will not be fooled. If it’s a fight you’re looking for, we will give you one,” Leoine said.

“And I will repeat, none of this I wanted to happen. These criminals are not under my control, if they were I would have punished them myself. Though, for that, I would need your help. In this our objectives are the same. Align yourself with me, help me take them down so they do not subjugate anyone else to this. They are not devoted to me, believe that.”

There was a ringing in Dorothea’s ears, and despite is she held onto every word that was uttered. It was unbelievable, what was being proposed, and the first person to retort was Jeralt. He snorted, not once letting down his guard, and said, “You’re either a liar or a maniac, in either case you’re not getting help from us, murderous wretch.”

“And you, Byleth Eisner, what is your answer? I stand here extending a hand. These people are no allies of mine since this is what they chose to inflict on the world. Our motives are not the same, believe me, I do not try the innocent.” The Flame Emperor sounded a breath away from pleading. Dorothea could not believe what she was seeing, and those eyes, she felt them sink into her for all the seconds they were aimed at her. Almost purposefully, and then he said, “And what of you?” Right at her. “Are you willing to pursue them, root them out from the soil of the earth?” Dorothea could not understand why she was being addressed at all. There must be a mistake, it was Byleth and Jeralt that were Rhea’s hands, how would she have any say in this?

“Listen, I am warning you,” Leoine said. Though to her dismay there was a look of appraisal on Byleth’s face. Like something in her was actually considering it. The expression of the stranger was hidden behind his mask, Dorothea could not tell what it was, and the feeling of dread was pounding at her. She looked at the eyes, and willed her mouth to speak, “No.”

“No? I see. That was expected. How could you trust a faceless enemy?” Dorothea was frozen in place, he had sounded _let down_. “You have to know me to trust me, and you do not.” And at that moment the throbbing in her head became too much. The Flame Emperor then moved, lightening fast, and left them in the dust.

On their journey back they had split up, most of her classmates had already ridden back to Garreg Mach, and she was left to be assisted by the healing unit. They led her back to the monastery, all the while Dorothea did not know wether to focus on her pain or the red mask of the Flame Emperor. She wondered what the face beneath the mask looked like, whether it was intact or misshapen. _What is the face of cowardice?_ She asked herself, _look in the mirror,_ the reply came. 

* * *

At the infirmary Manuela cobbled over her, fretting and cursing and for a moment, crying too. Poor, poor Thea. Lovely, sweetheart, oh I’m so sorry Thea. She cooed over her some more, cursing the hand that had stricken her. That hand is dead now, she thought. Manuela emptied up her entire schedule and took no more patients, she sent them to the other healers. Instead she had her sole focus on Dorothea, whipping her back into shape and spilling her heart out for how frightened the thought of losing Dorothea is.

“Oh, dear. Oh.” Manuela was not a typical person, and ofttimes too caught up in her own life, but she gave Dorothea exactly what she needed, and more. She was showing her concern and affection that she could barely remember from her own mother. It didn’t matter what had happened before, somehow. Dorothea wanted someone to fret over her like that for all eternity. It was intoxicating, being so important. 

An hour later she was feeling mostly restored. And the high of being cared for with such gentleness let her feel mostly herself again. But again images of beastly jaws and the sound of cracking spines flooded her mind. Edelgard appeared at the door, then. A box in her hand and a look that was fearful on her face.

Dorothea’s heart started, it wanted to jump out of its place. She held tighter onto the flagon of wine Manuela gave her.

“I came as soon as I found out,” Edelgard said, explaining like a kid caught red handed. “I swear, Dorothea, if I had known-“

“You would have been too busy, still. It’s fine, Edie. I’ve been tended to, you don’t have to worry.” Dorothea didn’t know where the stability of her voice came from, or the confidence of her words. Her stomach felt queasy with emotion. It was not fine, she had needed Edelgard badly.

“I would not have been too busy as to let you die.”

The atmosphere of the room grew tense, and Dorothea was debating with herself on how far she should take her reprimands. She wanted to sting her if just a little. It had hurt her, even if it wasn’t Edelgard’s fault, or her intention.

“Girls,” Manuela said, interfering in what she must have knew was shaping into a fight.

“You wouldn’t have let me died, no. Not when I’ve saved you as I have,” Dorothea was not going to back down, however. “Where were you? I cried out and screamed, I cried out for you.” She left out the continuation. _I cried for you, I cried because you were not with me._

She turned her head to hide the wetness of her eyes, and the sudden movement caused her to wince. Manuela immediately extended her hand, cradling Dorothea’s neck and asking her where it hurts. 

Edelgard stood silently, watching them from the sidelines. Dorothea did not know what she was pleading for exactly, but the throbbing in her neck distracted her from trying to sift through what to say next. Manuela was feeling for bruises up and down the length of it when she stopped suddenly, hand tensing in its place. 

She looked up from Dorothea straight at Edelgard, gaze hard, and said not a word. Edelgard looked like she swallowed her tongue.

It took Dorothea a second to understand what the silence was about. The part of her neck that held Edelgard’s bite marks and was usually hidden by her hair, had been exposed now that Manuela tended to her neck specifically. Dorothea had not imagined Manuela’s reaction to be so—icy. 

“Manuela, please,” Dorothea urged. She knew she wasn’t the one that she was angry at. Still, she had to do something. “I told her to, nothing was without my consent.”

That barely seemed to sway Manuela.

They told her then, and something in the way Edelgard was clearly containing jitters irked her. Manuela was hardly pleased, saying that the blood requirement would exceed what Dorothea could offer, this should only be done on animals, see. So that when they die you need not fret. 

Dorothea produced a bottle then. The same one, Edelgard recognized, that Dorothea had drank from in her room. “Look, this is ant tree bark and belladonna, and magic. It helps with the amount of blood I produce. I’m fine, I’m handling this fine.”

The canopy above the bed was drawn, Manuela had left them both to get some alone thinking time. What she could do to oppose this, Dorothea could not imagine. She had a hard time picking at the reasons she was upset at all. _You’ve seen her weep for you_ , _you are hers._ _You are her protege and her little girl,_ Dorothea reminded herself, and thought with an odd sense of triumph that she had been placed on a higher level than she had been most—all her life. This kind of protectiveness, despite its inconvenience, made her giddy.

“She won’t be mad for long,” Dorothea said, still not quite talking to Edelgard, but to the floor, and the linen of the nursing bed she was on.

Edelgard turned towards her, and despite the hesitance in her step came closer to where Dorothea was perched. “Perhaps. Dorothea, he did not tell me.”

She was trying at this again, fine. Dorothea was ready now, she didn’t feel as tenderly broken as she did when she first saw her. “Yes, said it would put you in peril and danger.” Dorothea raised a hand when she saw Edelgard wanting to interject. “And to some extent I understand that, he did not leave me to fend for myself, after all.” But I needed to be tended to, I had almost died, I had almost died.

Wasn’t that when true value was weighed? When it is life or death? Dorothea took a breath. “His devotion to you...”

The febrifuge that Manuela had made for her was set in a tall glass bottle next to the bed. There was a chance of reinfection, Manuela had told her, and should a fever threaten her, she should down it immediately. _“What is it made of” Dorothea had asked. “Lilac and willow bark.”_

Lilac.

“Will you reprimand him?”

“He should not withhold information from me, yes. And your health means a great deal to me,” Edelgard said, and started taking off a glove. She put it on a tray beside them, and held her hands up, an asking of permission. “But sending more reinforcement than necessary is an ineffective battle strategy.” She ended her sentence and placed her bare hand to Dorothea’s forehead. “No fever,” she said.

“Battle strategy. Dear Sothis, Edelgard do you hear yourself? What battle strategy? We are not in a war. Just say you were incapacitated.” Dorothea could feel a shiver run up her. Was she cold again? “I get it, I do. Just don’t frame things like I am some casualty in your army. We are classmates, and we—“ Her words got the better of her. Choosing them and choosing well, meant many things. She could pull out a drawer of explanations and labels to throw at what they were. But the thrill of the right choice and the pain of humiliation made her hesitate. There had to be a worth for her in there, at Edelgard’s inviting royal side.

“—and we should stick by each other’s side.” By the time she said what she wanted, Edelgard had taken off her other glove. She still had some amends to pay, despite not being guilty. That was how it was in things like these, Dorothea rationalized. Lovers had it stricter than others. If for nothing more than strengthening affection, pleading for each other’s good grace was a must.

Her mind wanted to correct her. The wrong word. _This one is too big._ This one implies a deep pooling of gold-flecked adoring. It implied that they were in love.

The front of Edelgard’s knuckles slid up and down Dorothea’s face then. She was waiting for her to finish what she was saying, patiently taking it in, stroking her now. Dorothea almost shut up just to focus on that touch alone, like it had something to say, like the revelation was how gentle Edelgard’s hands could be.

The knowledge that the body kept its attachments even during duress.

“Hmm.” Edelgard agreed. It looked like the shame was slowly fleeing her, and that apologies were now in full effect.

“You’re no soldier in no army, that’s for certain,” Edelgard said in an indecipherable tone. “We’re here to learn and graduate, and help what we can in the mean time.”

She didn’t lift her hands from Dorothea’s face at first, brushing her thumb across her cheek over and over again. Wanting to see it rosy and fine, no doubt. Then she slid her fingers and had them cup Dorothea’s chin, then trailed her way down her throat. Edelgard was looking at Dorothea’s lips. And her bite marks too.

“I’m told the Flame Emperor made you an offer,” she said, her fingers resting on Dorothea’s throat, extending to fit comfortably. She was mindlessly playing with Dorothea’s hair with her other hand. “A failed strategy. If I were to ask people to join my army, they would have to see my face, see my eyes, to know for certain wether I was lying or not. Wether I was worth following or not. He has it all wrong, you see.”

Dorothea could not figure out what Edelgard was trying to say. The eyes and the face and that nonsense. He was their enemy, a face could not possibly sway her ideals.

“Edie,” Dorothea said as a warning when Edelgard’s nails found the bluish marks in her skin, the ones she’d claimed for herself. “Edie.” Again, Dorothea shaped it so it wasn’t a moan, but only just. Her gut was filling up with warmth and the harshness of the day was bearing down her, steering her in the direction of heightened want. She does not like being alone. She doesn’t want to be so ever again.

Edelgard dug her nails in.

“Oh.” Dorothea let out a small yelp, Edelgard was wanting, and when Edelgard wanted Dorothea could only comply. What was it that the opera singers used to say? _Make people want to please you, Thea._

They were performers after all, and the love of the crowd was what they needed, and always will need. Even away from the stage Dorothea had needed to be liked, she needed to admired. Where would she be had they not admired her voice and face? But what she hadn’t put into perspective was what pit she’d fall into when _she_ admired, when she liked and wanted and desired.

How was she this easy? Dorothea gave up more of her neck, giving up more space for occupation, exposing the crux of what she can offer the princess of Adrestia.

“He must know how to win over a crowd,” Edelgard said, her left hand sliding up from Dorothea’s hair to cover her eyes instead. Her right went to spread her thighs, and made its way to the damp hair there, while her lips came to rest on Dorothea’s abused neck.

“What does it take to win you over, Dorothea?” Edelgard said and sank her teeth in her neck and her fingers into her cunt.

“Ah. Stability, a future, a— _ah. Fuck._ ” Dorothea’s gasps were unruly, her eyes were obscured by Edelgard’s warm hand, her neck was sending shock after shock to her already occupied hole. Was she this easy to sway with a few touches?

“Would it? Would you believe in something like that?” Edelgard said, pulling back just a fraction so her breath came rushing on the pinpricks of her skin. Her voice reeked with something untamed, and a creeping pain that struck—it struck Dorothea. “You’ll have to keep quite, anyone could hear.”

“Edie, my back still hurts. It still hurts.” Another deep gasp, followed by a whine.

“Do you want me to stop?”

The question was scandalous, how would she want any of this to stop? Dorothea took the stinging in, and let it wash over her other sensations. Everything she would feel because of Edelgard was proof of her attachment, proof of their shared humanity.

Instead of replying Dorothea reached out, hands flailing at the air, aiming for Edelgard’s face. Edelgard guided her cheek to Dorothea’s hand. She could not see what expression Edelgard had, but she could hear the breath coming off her and feel the living skin under her palm, the way the side of her lips turned upward into her cheek. _Smile and give it to me, I’m giving you all of it, I’m giving all of myself._

She pulled Edelgard down for a kiss and demanded her tongue be let in. When it was inside Dorothea felt it wet and sloppy against Edelgard’s, sliding on soft tissue and driving her all the more needy. Her tongue tasted of medicine where Edelgard’s tasted of blood. Thrumming blood—her blood. Her taste all over Edelgard and in her gut and in Edelgard’s own veins. Her life running through Edelgard, _oh. How important you are now, Thea._

“Tell me what it takes to win you,” Edelgard repeated, and it sounded like a want for clarity.

Her angle was hindered by the hand she had over Dorothea’s eyes, and which seemed to be staying there. Blindfolds, they need to make some. Have Edelgard tie scarfs and shawls around her eyes and make her submit to pleasure in the dark. She knew she’d be well taken care of, let her have her any way she wanted.

In the back of her mind Dorothea remembered the pain of death, and remembered the breath of the beast on top of her as it bared its fangs and claws, ready to strike life out of her as she laid motionless. The image flashed against the dark of her eyelids as Edelgard broke their kiss, descended on her neck, and claimed her with fang and tooth again and again and again, sucking life out of her, and blood and restrain. She had to visit the greenhouse later on and concoct various medicines. Manuela had been teaching her, and Dorothea wanted to make the most of the knowledge she possessed. Lilac and Belladonna for the fevers, lemon oil and poppy for the pain.

 _Lilac, Dorothea, you need lilac to heal,_ Manuela said.

Dorothea spread her legs and took what Edelgard gave. It was both suspended and dynamic, how nothing existed outside of that moment, how physical every emotion felt. Just like those fanciful songs said, the ones she’d called stupid out of unjust rage, out of broken hope. Just like the songs that spoke of the shadow of what desire was. Here, desire dripped off them onto the floor, as Dorothea’s cunt leaked and slopped. Her sex turned slick and steamy every time she was touched by Edelgard, loved by Edelgard, was tended to and received attention by Edelgard. She couldn’t see her, but in her mind Edelgard’s eyes were trained on her and every rise of her chest.

Dorothea wasn’t sure what the exchange was anymore, where the lines of give and take were drawn and defined, just that things got broken from inattention. She just knew that feeling found and feeling lost were now twin emotions in her heart, and that Edelgard would provoke both with little effort. _Make the crowd love you. Give them something so they’d give back._

_What must I give?_

_Everything that you are, Thea, your authentic inauthenticity. The promise that you’ll follow the script, and that you’re worth the trust, too. Worth your weight in gold._

She was told it didn’t have to be real, that she was an actress, and selling the thought was what mattered. But on the bed in the infirmary Dorothea seized, arched her back and shouted praise and love from between grit teeth. She had never felt herself say truer words than then, with Edelgard pushing them out of her with fingers and kisses and promises of clarity.

 _Her eyes are lilac._ She imagined them while Edelgard fucked her raw, but all she could see were the golden eyes behind the white and red mask and the beast of Remire descending on her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Gee, how do you characterize Dorothea?” “I play this game called Projecting Onto Dorothea Arnault”  
> Alrighty. Whoa that was a long one. Had midterms so that hindered my schedule ! And as is tradition im uploading this after pulling an all nighter... should you notice anything out of place notify me (im open to characterization/voice criticism, too)  
> Anyway, hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think!


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